Brain Droppings

Testing

2011-09-06T23:10:00.000-05:00

It's been quite a while since I posted. I updated my template. Maybe it will inspire me to write more, share more. Let's see what the future holds.

New Look

2008-07-29T12:42:00.002-05:00

My template broke. I'm more than a little bummed about it. It would appear that The Blog Cafe went out of business. That's too bad because I liked their templates. Well, I'll just play around until I get something else I like.

2008-06-24T12:41:00.003-05:00

I didn't think anything could be worse than my Friday post but this takes the cake:

Children fed 'silly pills,' forced to perform sex shows
Story Highlights
Defendants convicted of grooming kids for sex shows in "kindergarten" classes
They gave Vicodin to the kids and called the drugs "silly pills"
Residents thought there were swinger parties going on; didn't know children involved
The kids are now in therapy, a Texas Child Protective Services caseworker says
MINEOLA, Texas (AP) -- In the windowless front rooms of a former day care center in a tiny Texas community, children as young as 5 were fed powerful painkillers they knew as "silly pills" and forced to perform sex shows for a crowd of adults.
Two people have already been convicted in the case. Now a third person with ties to the club, previously known in town only as a swingers group, is set to go on trial Monday not far from Mineola, population 5,100.
"This really shook this town," said Shirley Chadwick, a longtime resident of Mineola. "This was horrible."
Patrick Kelly, 41, is charged with aggravated sexual assault of a child, tampering with physical evidence and engaging in organized criminal activity.
In all, six adults have been charged in connection with the case, including a parent of the three siblings involved.
Jurors this year deliberated less than five minutes before returning guilty verdicts against the first two defendants, who were accused of grooming the kids for sex shows in "kindergarten" classes and passing off Vicodin as "silly pills" to help the children perform.
Jamie Pittman and Shauntel Mayo were sentenced to life in prison. Kelly also faces a life sentence if convicted, and Smith County prosecutors hope for another swift verdict.
Thad Davidson, Kelly's attorney, said his client passed a lie-detector test proving his innocence and worries about getting a fair trial in Tyler, 25 miles southeast of Mineola, which is in Wood County.
"I think it's impossible to get a fair trial within 80 miles of Smith County," Davidson said.
Mineola, about 80 miles east of Dallas, is a close-knit, conservative bean-processing town of with more than 30 churches. Residents there want to put the scandal behind them as quickly as possible.
The one-story building where prosecutors say four children -- the three siblings, now ages 12, 10 and 7, and their 10-year-old aunt -- were trained to perform in front of an audience of 50 to 100 once a week has been vacant since the landlord ousted the alleged organizers in 2004.
Down a slight hill is a retirement home, and even closer is the office of the local newspaper. Doris Newman, editor of The Mineola Monitor, said rumors of swinger parties spread around town but that no one mentioned children being involved.
Newman, who can see the building from her office window, said she remembers the parking lot filling up with more than a dozen cars at night.
In August 2004, an editorial under the headline "Sex In the City" opined that if the swingers left quietly, "we'll try and forget they've infiltrated our town with their set of moral standards."
"It's not that we're trying to look the other way," Newman said. "But there's a lot more to Mineola than that."
According to a Mineola police report, the department first investigated a complaint in June 2005 in which the siblings' foster mother said one of the girls described dancing toward men and another child saying that "everybody does nasty stuff in there."
In the second trial, Child Protective Services caseworker Kristi Hachtel testified, "I've seen a lot and I never in my wildest dreams imagined this. They were preyed upon in probably one of the most heinous ways possible."
The children are now doing better, the welfare agency said.
"Through counseling and therapy sessions, these children are now finally feeling secure and safe," agency spokeswoman Shari Pulliam wrote in an e-mail.
Permanent custody of the three siblings was given to John and Margie Cantrell. This week, prosecutors in California charged John Cantrell with sexually assaulting a child in the state 18 years ago. Margie Cantrell said her husband is innocent.
Kelly's attorney moved Friday asking to postpone the trial in light of the allegations against Cantrell, a state witness. Texas Child Protective Services said it would be "common" for the agency to investigate.
The Rev. Tim Letsch is opening a church in the yellow-plastered building where the children were abused. He acknowledges that building a congregation might be difficult because of the stigma attached to the property.
"You got to decide whether you're willing to forgive those kind of things," Letsch said. "It's a hard deal. Especially for a spiritual person to walk in and say, 'This happened here."'
Copyright 2008 The Associated Press. All rights reserved.This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

Is there a special place in hell for people like this? I mean REALLY now people. This world is going to hell in a hand basket. I have several problems with this situation.

That parents pimped their kids for this
That ADULTS paid to watch this
That parents got paid for their kids to do this
That these children were DRUGGED with Vicodin
That ADULTS paid to watch this AND not one thought it was wrong and went to the police

I'm just very angry and saddened. It's like a blow to the spirit. If Jesus showed up tomorrow, I would not be surprised.

A Friday WTF Moment

2008-06-20T19:21:00.005-05:00

I read the following article and I had to pause. Enough so that I wanted to actually blog about it. i mean it broke me of my addiction to social networks.

Mass. girls may have made pact to get pregnant
By MELISSA TRUJILLO, Associated Press Writer

The girls showed up repeatedly at the high school health clinic, asking for pregnancy tests. But their reactions to the test results were puzzling: high-fives if they were expecting, long faces if they weren't.

School officials in this hard-luck New England fishing town say an alarming 17 girls — four times the usual number — became pregnant this year. And even more disturbing: Some of the girls may have made a pact to have babies and raise them together.

"A typical girl you would think would say, `Oh my God! What am I going to do now? How am I going to support this baby? How am I going to finish school?'" Superintendent Christopher Farmer said. "These young women clearly have not seen that."

The story exploded after Joseph Sullivan, the principal of Gloucester High School, was quoted by Time magazine this week as saying the girls confessed to making such a pact. Sullivan was on vacation Friday and did not return calls for comment.

The superintendent said he had no independent confirmation of a pact. But he added: "What we do know is there was a group of students being tested for pregnancy on a regular basis, which would suggest they were not taking steps to avoid becoming pregnant, and that when some of them had their babies, they appeared to be very pleased."

None of the girls or their families have come forward to confirm any type of pact, and school and health officials have not identified any of the youngsters.

The girls are all 16 or under, nearly all of them sophomores. The superintendent said they have been reluctant to identify the fathers, many of whom are older. But one of them "is a 24-year-old homeless guy," the principal was quoted as telling Time.

City and school officials in this town of about 30,000 people 30 miles north of Boston have been struggling for months to explain and deal with the pregnancies, where on average only four girls a year at the 1,200-student high school become pregnant.

Just last month, two officials at the high school health center resigned to protest the local hospital's refusal to support a proposal to distribute contraceptives to youngsters at the school without parental consent. The hospital controls the clinic's funding.

Mayor Carolyn Kirk said Friday there are many contributing factors to what she called a "blip" in the pregnancy rate, from glamorization of teen pregnancy in pop culture to cuts in funding that have reduced teachers and health classes in Gloucester.

"We have fallen on hard times," Kirk said of her city, which has suffered in recent decades with the decline in the fishing industry that has defined Gloucester since the colonial era.

Gloucester is the town that lost six fishermen in the 1991 shipwreck that inspired the book and movie "The Perfect Storm." Its high school teams are known as the Fighting Fishermen.

Student Council member Emily Spreer said many of the girls came from difficult socioeconomic circumstances: "Their circle or clique, they're not the most fortunate family-wise."

"If you're a young person who really is struggling to find an identity for herself, absent the support and the guidance, it can become almost a default option for some to become a mom," said Patricia Quinn, executive director of the Massachusetts Alliance on Teen Pregnancy. "We need to do more for young people and show them more paths."

Gloucester — a heavily Roman Catholic town with a large Italian and Portuguese population — has long been supportive of teen mothers. The high school has a day care center for students and employees.

Christen Callahan, a former Gloucester High student who had a child when she was 15, said on NBC's "Today" show that some of the girls would ask her about her own pregnancy. "They would say stuff like, `Oh, I think my parents would be fine with it and they would help me,' stuff like that," Callahan said.

Sarah Brown, chief executive of the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy, suggested some of the blame lies with the nation's Hollywood-obsessed culture, in which stories about pregnant celebrities abound.

Just this week, 17-year-old TV star Jamie Lynn Spears, the unmarried sister of Britney Spears, gave birth. "Juno," a wry comedy about a 16-year-old girl who gets pregnant, was one of the most acclaimed movies of the year.

"Baby bumps get written about the same way designer handbags do. It's just one more lifestyle choice, just another personal expression: these shoes, this bump and that handbag," Brown said. "It's not surprising that teenage girls can get confused or even seduced by the allure of celebrity pregnancy."
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AP reporters Pauline Arrillaga in Phoenix and Nancy Kelsey and Karen Testa in Boston contributed to this report.

I don't know if these girls really know what they are getting into. Having a baby is easy - raising a baby is a different story. What would you do if your found out your daughter was trying to get pregnant on purpose and couldn't even legally drive a car? Here is my train of thought:

She isn't allowed to get an abortion. She got pregnant on purpose she gets to see the pregnancy through to the end. But - would you let her put the baby up for adoption?
I'm split on adoption. One part of me says that realistically, grandma would be raising the baby while my daughter tries to finish school and work (cause sister needs a job to buy diapers and clothes and pay for daycare). Another part of me thinks that someone else might be able to give the baby the love and care that he/she needs
My child would not know freedom any more - although with me she wouldn't have known it in the first place but she would be under even stricter who, what when and where's. As in who are you going with. What are you going to be doing? Where are you going to be and when will you be home? Plus surprise visits to verify her story
You have to finish school and you need to be working on college plans

That's it for now. This whole story makes my children's lives that much harder because I'm going to be even more vigilant.

Long Time, No Blog

2008-06-20T19:05:00.002-05:00

It's been a while since I blogged about anything significant. I blame the following:

The Brook on ning.com
Illinisoul on ning.com
The Brook on ning.com
Illinisoul on ning.com
Mix in a little Facebook
This little thing called work

Essentially I have become addicted to a social network for people that grew up in my hometown and one for my alma mater. Pretty much to the exclusion of everything else. It's ridiculous. Now that the growth of the sites have slowed down - a little - I want to get back to blogging on the regular. I just need to decide what I want to talk about. I say this all the time but I REALLY mean it this time.

You Say It's Your Birthday...

2008-05-16T19:18:00.002-05:00

Well today it is my birthday. For once I have plans outside of family dinner. For those wondering why I dropped off the face of the earth, I've been sucked into ning.com. All about the social networks. If one of your so-called friends invites you to join a ning.com network don't be friends with them ANYMORE. Real friends don't introduce friends to ning.com. :)

Brainteasers

2008-04-18T14:27:00.002-05:00

This is an interesting test. I got 10 out of 11 correct. You are going to hate yourself over this. It scores automatically, too. Take this advice - be sure to think before you answer.

Click here: How Smart Are You?

Be Blessed

2008-04-02T10:09:00.002-05:00

Every time I hear "Be Blessed" by Bishop Paul Morton, I feel the spirit move within me. It moves me to tears. Prayer is so powerful. I sometimes wonder if people realize how much so. As the song says "I pray for you. You pray for me. And watch God change things." It doesn't say right away but God will answer you in His own time. Since this has blessed me, I want to bless you. Enjoy and BE BLESSED...

Say What?!

2008-03-19T17:13:00.003-05:00

I personally haven't heard the speech Senator Barack Obama gave on race. I've read and heard snippets but finally had the opportunity to read the speech in its entirety. Here it is as found in the Chicago Defender. I'm posting this because I believe in sharing the knowledge and letting people make educated decisions for themselves. I'm also sharing because I believe he says - FINALLY - what many people think but are afraid to say: That race is an issue in America that won't be solved until it is openly acknowledged and dealt with. I hope this is the first step in a new direction.
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Barack Obama gives speech on race in U.S.

Text of Obama's March 18 Address on Race Text of Barack Obama's remarks in Philadelphia. "We the people, in order to form a more perfect union." Two hundred and twenty one years ago, in a hall that still stands across the street, a group of men gathered and, with these simple words, launched America's improbable experiment in democracy.

Farmers and scholars; statesmen and patriots who had traveled across an ocean to escape tyranny and persecution finally made real their declaration of independence at a Philadelphia convention that lasted through the spring of 1787.

The document they produced was eventually signed but ultimately unfinished. It was stained by this nation's original sin of slavery, a question that divided the colonies and brought the convention to a stalemate until the founders chose to allow the slave trade to continue for at least twenty more years, and to leave any final resolution to future generations.

Of course, the answer to the slavery question was already embedded within our Constitution - a Constitution that had at is very core the ideal of equal citizenship under the law; a Constitution that promised its people liberty, and justice, and a union that could be and should be perfected over time.

And yet words on a parchment would not be enough to deliver slaves from bondage, or provide men and women of every color and creed their full rights and obligations as citizens of the United States.

What would be needed were Americans in successive generations who were willing to do their part - through protests and struggle, on the streets and in the courts, through a civil war and civil disobedience and always at great risk - to narrow that gap between the promise of our ideals and the reality of their time.

This was one of the tasks we set forth at the beginning of this campaign - to continue the long march of those who came before us, a march for a more just, more equal, more free, more caring and more prosperous America.

I chose to run for the presidency at this moment in history because I believe deeply that we cannot solve the challenges of our time unless we solve them together - unless we perfect our union by understanding that we may have different stories, but we hold common hopes; that we may not look the same and we may not have come from the same place, but we all want to move in the same direction- towards a better future for of children and our grandchildren.

This belief comes from my unyielding faith in the decency and generosity of the American people. But it also comes from my own American story. I am the son of a black man from Kenya and a white woman from Kansas. I was raised with the help of a white grandfather who survived a Depression to serve in Patton's Army during World War II and a white grandmother who worked on a bomber assembly line at Fort Leavenworth while he was overseas.

I've gone to some of the best schools in America and lived in one of the world's poorest nations. I am married to a black American who carries within her the blood of slaves and slaveowners - an inheritance we pass on to our two precious daughters. I have brothers, sisters, nieces, nephews, uncles and cousins, of every race and every hue, scattered across three continents, and for as long as I live, I will never forget that in no other country on Earth is my story even possible.

IT'S A STORY that hasn't made me the most conventional candidate. But it is a story that has seared into my genetic makeup the idea that this nation is more than the sum of its parts - that out of many, we are truly one. Throughout the first year of this campaign, against all predictions to the contrary, we saw how hungry the American people were for this message of unity.

Despite the temptation to view my candidacy through a purely racial lens, we won commanding victories in states with some of the whitest populations in the country. In South Carolina, where the Confederate Flag still flies, we built a powerful coalition of African Americans and white Americans. This is not to say that race has not been an issue in the campaign.

At various stages in the campaign, some commentators have deemed me either "too black" or "not black enough." We saw racial tensions bubble to the surface during the week before the South Carolina primary. The press has scoured every exit poll for the latest evidence of racial polarization, not just in terms of white and black, but black and brown as well.

And yet, it has only been in the last couple of weeks that the discussion of race in this campaign has taken a particularly divisive turn. On one end of the spectrum, we've heard the implication that my candidacy is somehow an exercise in affirmative action; that it's based solely on the desire of wide-eyed liberals to purchase racial reconciliation on the cheap.

On the other end, we've heard my former pastor, Reverend Jeremiah Wright, use incendiary language to express views that have the potential not only to widen the racial divide, but views that denigrate both the greatness and the goodness of our nation; that rightly offend white and black alike.

I have already condemned, in unequivocal terms, the statements of Reverend Wright that have caused such controversy. For some, nagging questions remain. Did I know him to be an occasionally fierce critic of American domestic and foreign policy? Of course. Did I ever hear him make remarks that could be considered controversial while I sat in church? Yes.

Did I strongly disagree with many of his political views? Absolutely - just as I'm sure many of you have heard remarks from your pastors, priests, or rabbis with which you strongly disagreed. But the remarks that have caused this recent firestorm weren't simply controversial. They weren't simply a religious leader's effort to speak out against perceived injustice.

Instead, they expressed a profoundly distorted view of this country - a view that sees white racism as endemic, and that elevates what is wrong with America above all that we know is right with America; a view that sees the conflicts in the Middle East as rooted primarily in the actions of stalwart allies like Israel, instead of emanating from the perverse and hateful ideologies of radical Islam.

As such, Reverend Wright's comments were not only wrong but divisive, divisive at a time when we need unity; racially charged at a time when we need to come together to solve a set of monumental problems - two wars, a terrorist threat, a falling economy, a chronic health care crisis and potentially devastating climate change; problems that are neither black or white or Latino or Asian, but rather problems that confront us all.

GIVEN MY BACKGROUND, my politics, and my professed values and ideals, there will no doubt be those for whom my statements of condemnation are not enough.

Why associate myself with Reverend Wright in the first place, they may ask? Why not join another church? And I confess that if all that I knew of Reverend Wright were the snippets of those sermons that have run in an endless loop on the television and You Tube, or if Trinity United Church of Christ conformed to the caricatures being peddled by some commentators, there is no doubt that I would react in much the same way But the truth is, that isn't all that I know of the man.

The man I met more than twenty years ago is a man who helped introduce me to my Christian faith, a man who spoke to me about our obligations to love one another; to care for the sick and lift up the poor.

He is a man who served his country as a U.S. Marine; who has studied and lectured at some of the finest universities and seminaries in the country, and who for over thirty years led a church that serves the community by doing God's work here on Earth - by housing the homeless, ministering to the needy, providing day care services and scholarships and prison ministries, and reaching out to those suffering from HIV/AIDS.

In my first book, Dreams From My Father, I described the experience of my first service at Trinity: "People began to shout, to rise from their seats and clap and cry out, a forceful wind carrying the reverend's voice up into the rafters . . . And in that single note- hope! - I heard something else; at the foot of that cross, inside the thousands of churches across the city, I imagined the stories of ordinary black people merging with the stories of David and Goliath, Moses and Pharaoh, the Christians in the lion's den, Ezekiel's field of dry bones.

Those stories -of survival, and freedom, and hope - became our story, my story; the blood that had spilled was our blood, the tears our tears; until this black church, on this bright day, seemed once more a vessel carrying the story of a people into future generations and into a larger world.

Our trials and triumphs became at once unique and universal, black and more than black; in chronicling our journey, the stories and songs gave us a means to reclaim memories that we didn't need to feel shame about . . . memories that all people might study and cherish - and with which we could start to rebuild." That has been my experience at Trinity.

Like other predominantly black churches across the country, Trinity embodies the black community in its entirety - the doctor and the welfare mom, the model student and the former gang-banger. Like other black churches, Trinity's services are full of raucous laughter and sometimes bawdy humor.

They are full of dancing, clapping, screaming and shouting that may seem jarring to the untrained ear. The church contains in full the kindness and cruelty, the fierce intelligence and the shocking ignorance, the struggles and successes, the love and yes, the bitterness and bias that make up the black experience in America.

And this helps explain, perhaps, my relationship with Reverend Wright. As imperfect as he may be, he has been like family to me. He strengthened my faith, officiated my wedding, and baptized my children.

Not once in my conversations with him have I heard him talk about any ethnic group in derogatory terms, or treat whites with whom he interacted with anything but courtesy and respect. He contains within him the contradictions - the good and the bad - of the community that he has served diligently for so many years.

I CAN NO MORE disown him than I can disown the black community. I can no more disown him than I can my white grandmother - a woman who helped raise me, a woman who sacrificed again and again for me, a woman who loves me as much as she loves anything in this world, but a woman who once confessed her fear of black men who passed by her on the street, and who on more than one occasion has uttered racial or ethnic stereotypes that made me cringe.

These people are a part of me. And they are a part of America, this country that I love. Some will see this as an attempt to justify or excuse comments that are simply inexcusable.

I can assure you it is not. I suppose the politically safe thing would be to move on from this episode and just hope that it fades into the woodwork. We can dismiss Reverend Wright as a crank or a demagogue, just as some have dismissed Geraldine Ferraro, in the aftermath of her recent statements, as harboring some deep-seated racial bias.

But race is an issue that I believe this nation cannot afford to ignore right now. We would be making the same mistake that Reverend Wright made in his offending sermons about America - to simplify and stereotype and amplify the negative to the point that it distorts reality.

The fact is that the comments that have been made and the issues that have surfaced over the last few weeks reflect the complexities of race in this country that we've never really worked through - a part of our union that we have yet to perfect.

And if we walk away now, if we simply retreat into our respective corners, we will never be able to come together and solve challenges like health care, or education, or the need to find good jobs for every American. Understanding this reality requires a reminder of how we arrived at this point. As William Faulkner once wrote, "The past isn't dead and buried. In fact, it isn't even past."

We do not need to recite here the history of racial injustice in this country. But we do need to remind ourselves that so many of the disparities that exist in the African- American community today can be directly traced to inequalities passed on from an earlier generation that suffered under the brutal legacy of slavery and Jim Crow.

SEGREGATED SCHOOLS were, and are, inferior schools; we still haven't fixed them, fifty years after Brown v. Board of Education, and the inferior education they provided, then and now, helps explain the pervasive achievement gap between today's black and white students.

Legalized discrimination - where blacks were prevented, often through violence, from owning property, or loans were not granted to African-American business owners, or black homeowners could not access FHA mortgages, or blacks were excluded from unions, or the police force, or fire departments - meant that black families could not amass any meaningful wealth to bequeath to future generations.

That history helps explain the wealth and income gap between black and white, and the concentrated pockets of poverty that persists in so many of today's urban and rural communities. A lack of economic opportunity among black men, and the shame and frustration that came from not being able to provide for one's family, contributed to the erosion of black families - a problem that welfare policies for many years may have worsened.

And the lack of basic services in so many urban black neighborhoods - parks for kids to play in, police walking the beat, regular garbage pick-up and building code enforcement - all helped create a cycle of violence, blight and neglect that continue to haunt us.

This is the reality in which Reverend Wright and other African- Americans of his generation grew up. They came of age in the late fifties and early sixties, a time when segregation was still the law of the land and opportunity was systematically constricted.

What's remarkable is not how many failed in the face of discrimination, but rather how many men and women overcame the odds; how many were able to make a way out of no way for those like me who would come after them.

But for all those who scratched and clawed their way to get a piece of the American Dream, there were many who didn't make it - those who were ultimately defeated, in one way or another, by discrimination.

That legacy of defeat was passed on to future generations - those young men and increasingly young women who we see standing on street corners or languishing in our prisons, without hope or prospects for the future.

Even for those blacks who did make it, questions of race, and racism, continue to define their worldview in fundamental ways. For the men and women of Reverend Wright's generation, the memories of humiliation and doubt and fear have not gone away; nor has the anger and the bitterness of those years.

That anger may not get expressed in public, in front of white co-workers or white friends. But it does find voice in the barbershop or around the kitchen table. At times, that anger is exploited by politicians, to gin up votes along racial lines, or to make up for a politician's own failings. And occasionally it finds voice in the church on Sunday morning, in the pulpit and in the pews.

The fact that so many people are surprised to hear that anger in some of Reverend Wright's sermons simply reminds us of the old truism that the most segregated hour in American life occurs on Sunday morning.

That anger is not always productive; indeed, all too often it distracts attention from solving real problems; it keeps us from squarely facing our own complicity in our condition, and prevents the African-American community from forging the alliances it needs to bring about real change.

But the anger is real; it is powerful; and to simply wish it away, to condemn it without understanding its roots, only serves to widen the chasm of misunderstanding that exists between the races.

IN FACT, A SIMILAR ANGER exists within segments of the white community. Most working- and middle-class white Americans don't feel that they have been particularly privileged by their race.

Their experience is the immigrant experience - as far as they're concerned, no one's handed them anything, they've built it from scratch. They've worked hard all their lives, many times only to see their jobs shipped overseas or their pension dumped after a lifetime of labor.

They are anxious about their futures, and feel their dreams slipping away; in an era of stagnant wages and global competition, opportunity comes to be seen as a zero sum game, in which your dreams come at my expense.

Long Time, No Post

2008-03-13T14:48:00.002-05:00

I know that I haven't posted in a while but I wanted to give Matthew some top billing since his news was so awesome and I was so proud. Anywho, I got this in the mail today and I knew I had to post it. Just in time for Easter. Enjoy!
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PEEP SHOW!

Matthew Jones - Supastar!

2008-02-19T15:13:00.003-06:00

I'm proud to say that I know a movie star - Matthew Adam Jones. Actually we've known that he was a star for a while. Now everyone will know.

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it has been a while
the time has come for good news
and it's really big

just shot a great film
the character name - haiku
all lines, in this form

the movie's called BREAK
i'm a badass assassin
you can check it out

www.nocleanbreak.com

Matthew is the handsome fellow on the left...

Tuesday Tickle

2008-02-19T12:45:00.002-06:00

As usual, I was perusing my emails and this one made me laugh - out loud. So I am sharing. Enjoy!

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Wash and Curl

A woman stuck her head into a hair salon and asked, "How long before I can get a wash & curl?" The beautician looked around the salon full of customers and said, "about 2 hours." The woman left.

A few days later, the same woman stuck her head in the door and asked, "How long before I can get a wash & curl?" The beautician looked around at the salon and said, "about 3 hours." The woman left.

A week later, the same woman stuck her head in the salon and asked, "How long before I can get a wash & curl?" The beautician looked around the salon and said, "about a hour and a half." The woman left.

The beautician turned to her girlfriend and said, "Hey Juanita, do me a favor. Follow that woman and see where she goes. She keeps asking how long she has to wait for a wash & curl, but then she doesn't ever come back."

A little while later, Juanita returned to the salon, laughing hysterically. The beautician asked, "So, where does that woman go when she leaves?" Juanita looked up, wiped the tears from her eyes and said, "Your man's house!"

It's All About Love

2008-02-14T11:36:00.003-06:00

Happy Valentine's Day! When we were growing up, my mom would always tell my brother and I that this holiday isn't just a "lover's holiday". It's about love and anyone can celebrate that, right? So with that said, happy valentine's day to one and all and I give you this:

How Fast Are You?

2008-02-08T13:09:00.000-06:00

Test your reaction time with this special test. Supposedly, the automobile driving manual says the average driver's reaction time is: .75 seconds....... or 1 car length for every 10 mph..........

Click here to test your average reaction time.

Aisha Lewis - The Next Triad Idol

2008-02-07T10:53:00.000-06:00

My friend and children's godmother (Godmommy to them) is participating in the Triad Idol. I got this message from her the other day:

In case you want to take a 1 minute break from your busy day, please check out my audition from the first round of the Triad Idol 2008 competition, held in Greensboro, NC. There are 4 rounds total, and the winner gets a really nice prize in addition to singing at some local performances in the area. I will be moving on to the quarter-final round next week.

Because I am such a good friend, here is said audition:

You go Ms. Lewis!

Super Tuesday

2008-02-05T08:56:00.001-06:00

If your state is part of Super Tuesday, I strongly encourage you to vote today. Whether you are a supporter of the Republicans, Democrats or Green Party, your voice makes a difference.

Personally, I am supporting Senator Barack Obama. I'm one of those people that chooses based on the issues that concern me. Senator Obama is speaking my language right now. If you haven't seen the following video, check it out:

While I would love that everyone support Senator Obama, my concern is that you are part of the process and get out and vote! People worked too long and hard for African-Americans to get a right to vote not to vote. It's like a slap in the face. Vote, vote, vote!

Did I mention you should vote? Happy Super Tuesday!

Vote Chooser

2008-01-31T17:41:00.000-06:00

Need help deciding which candidate to support in 2008. Votechooser.com has a 10 question quiz that makes it pretty easy. Whoever your candidate of choice is, I encourage everyone to get involved in the election process. You need to vote to make your voice heard.

Let Them Eat...Dirt

2008-01-29T16:15:00.001-06:00

For all the complaining we are doing about the economy, we should be lucky that we are blessed by the best we don't live in Haiti (or any 3rd world country for that matter).
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In hungry Haiti, dirt is food

By JONATHAN M. KATZ, Associated Press Writer 21 minutes ago

It was lunchtime in one of Haiti's worst slums, and Charlene Dumas was eating mud.

With food prices rising, Haiti's poorest can't afford even a daily plate of rice, and some take desperate measures to fill their bellies.

Charlene, 16 with a 1-month-old son, has come to rely on a traditional Haitian remedy for hunger pangs: cookies made of dried yellow dirt from the country's central plateau.

The mud has long been prized by pregnant women and children here as an antacid and source of calcium. But in places like Cite Soleil, the oceanside slum where Charlene shares a two-room house with her baby, five siblings and two unemployed parents, cookies made of dirt, salt and vegetable shortening have become a regular meal.

"When my mother does not cook anything, I have to eat them three times a day," Charlene said. Her baby, named Woodson, lay still across her lap, looking even thinner than the slim 6 pounds 3 ounces he weighed at birth.

Though she likes their buttery, salty taste, Charlene said the cookies also give her stomach pains. "When I nurse, the baby sometimes seems colicky too," she said.

Food prices around the world have spiked because of higher oil prices, needed for fertilizer, irrigation and transportation. Prices for basic ingredients such as corn and wheat are also up sharply, and the increasing global demand for biofuels is pressuring food markets as well.

The problem is particularly dire in the Caribbean, where island nations depend on imports and food prices are up 40 percent in places.

The global price hikes, together with floods and crop damage from the 2007 hurricane season, prompted the U.N. Food and Agriculture Agency to declare states of emergency in Haiti and several other Caribbean countries. Caribbean leaders held an emergency summit in December to discuss cutting food taxes and creating large regional farms to reduce dependence on imports.

At the market in the La Saline slum, two cups of rice now sell for 60 cents, up 10 cents from December and 50 percent from a year ago. Beans, condensed milk and fruit have gone up at a similar rate, and even the price of the edible clay has risen over the past year by almost $1.50. Dirt to make 100 cookies now costs $5, the cookie makers say.

Still, at about 5 cents apiece, the cookies are a bargain compared to food staples. About 80 percent of people in Haiti live on less than $2 a day and a tiny elite controls the economy.

Merchants truck the dirt from the central town of Hinche to the La Saline market, a maze of tables of vegetables and meat swarming with flies. Women buy the dirt, then process it into mud cookies in places such as Fort Dimanche, a nearby shanty town.

Carrying buckets of dirt and water up ladders to the roof of the former prison for which the slum is named, they strain out rocks and clumps on a sheet, and stir in shortening and salt. Then they pat the mixture into mud cookies and leave them to dry under the scorching sun.

The finished cookies are carried in buckets to markets or sold on the streets.

A reporter sampling a cookie found that it had a smooth consistency and sucked all the moisture out of the mouth as soon as it touched the tongue. For hours, an unpleasant taste of dirt lingered.

Assessments of the health effects are mixed. Dirt can contain deadly parasites or toxins, but can also strengthen the immunity of fetuses in the womb to certain diseases, said Gerald N. Callahan, an immunology professor at Colorado State University who has studied geophagy, the scientific name for dirt-eating.

Haitian doctors say depending on the cookies for sustenance risks malnutrition.

"Trust me, if I see someone eating those cookies, I will discourage it," said Dr. Gabriel Thimothee, executive director of Haiti's health ministry.

Marie Noel, 40, sells the cookies in a market to provide for her seven children. Her family also eats them.

"I'm hoping one day I'll have enough food to eat, so I can stop eating these," she said. "I know it's not good for me."

Copyright © 2008 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. The information contained in the AP News report may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed without the prior written authority of The Associated Press.

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You Have No Power Over Me

2008-01-29T15:47:00.000-06:00

Someone write that on a box of donuts. Considering how close we are to New Year's and resolutions, it's very a propos. But you know what it made me think of? It made me think of this:

and this

and this

Still don't know what I'm talking about. The movie is Labyrinth with a very young Jennifer Connelly and not so young David Bowie. I loved, loved, loved that movie. Gonna have to add it to the queue on NetFlix. For those that still don't remember, check out the trailer.

National Mental Health Care Week

2008-01-29T13:49:00.000-06:00

I know it's not nice to make fun of those who have mental problems but this made me smile. So I apologize in advance for laughing but if you laugh too, that makes you just as bad.
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This coming week is National Mental Health Care week.

Please post this new menu near the phone for the Voice Mail service on our switchboard has changed. This new menu allows for faster response to your special needs.

Mental Hospital Phone Menu

Please select from the following menu options:

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.
If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want, stay on the line so we can trace your call.
If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the Mother Ship.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway.
If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696.
If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
If you have low self-esteem, please hang up our operators are too busy to talk with you.
If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. You won't be crazy forever.
If you are blonde, don't press any buttons, you'll just mess it up.

You can do your part by remembering to contact at least one unstable person to show you care.

Well, I did my part. it’s your turn now.

Know the Signs to Save a Life

2008-01-29T13:00:00.000-06:00

Sometimes a little knowledge can make a difference.
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STROKE: Remember The 1st Three Letters.... S.T.R.

My nurse friend sent this and encouraged me to post it and spread the word. I agree.
If everyone can remember something this simple, we could save some folks. Seriously... Please read.

STROKE IDENTIFICATION:
During a BBQ, a friend stumbled and took a little fall - she assured everyone that she was fine (they offered to call paramedics) .....she said she had just tripped over a brick because of her new shoes.

They got her cleaned up and got her a new plate of food. While she appeared a bit shaken up, Ingrid went about enjoying herself the rest of the evening.

Ingrid's husband called later telling everyone that his wife had been taken to the hospital - (at 6:00 pm Ingrid passed away.) She had suffered a stroke at the BBQ. Had they known how to identify the signs of a stroke, perhaps In grid would be with us today. Some don't die.... they end up in a helpless, hopeless condition instead.

It only takes a minute to read this...A neurologist says that if he can get to a stroke victim within 3 hours he can totally reverse the effects of a stroke... totally . He said the trick was getting a stroke recognized, diagnosed, and then getting the patient medically cared for within 3 hours, which is tough.

RECOGNIZING A STROKE:
Thank God for the sense to remember the '3' steps, STR . Read and Learn!

Sometimes symptoms of a stroke are difficult to identify. Unfortunately, the lack of awareness spells disaster. The stroke victim may suffer severe brain damage when people nearby fail to recognize the symptoms of a stroke.

Now doctors say a bystander can recognize a stroke by asking three simple questions:

Ask the individual to SMILE.
Ask the person to TALK and SPEAK A SIMPLE SENTENCE - Coherently. (i.e. It is sunny out today)
Ask him or her to RAISE BOTH ARMS.

If he or she has trouble with ANY ONE of these tasks, call 999/911 immediately and describe the symptoms to the dispatcher.

New Sign of a Stroke -------- Stick out Your Tongue
NOTE: Ask the person to 'stick' out his tongue.. If the tongue is 'crooked', if it goes to one side or the other, that is also an indication of a stroke.

Delete, Delete, Delete

2008-01-25T11:25:00.001-06:00

On another note, don't use company-issued electronics to conduct your extra-marital affair. Apparently, this is just one of the texts they found on Chief of Staff Christine Beatty's city-issued pager:

'You made me feel so damn good'

The Detroit Free Press obtained nearly 14,000 text messages from the pager of Christine Beatty, chief of staff of Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick, many of which describe a sexual relationship. Excerpts posted on the paper's Web site:
9/28/2002, 11:53 p.m.
Beatty: Where are you now?
Kilpatrick: At home waiting for all [executive protection unit officers] to leave. Where are you?
Beatty: At the residence inn in Madison hgts.
Kilpatrick: What rm?
Beatty: I'm in room 311 in bldg 3 in the back.
10/7/2002, 11:20 p.m.
Beatty: OK, I'm feeling like I want another night like the most recent Saturday at the Residence Inn! You made me feel so damn good that night. As you can see I can't let it go!
10/16/2002, 11:48 p.m.
Kilpatrick: I've been dreaming all day about having you all to myself for 3 days ... relaxing, laughing, talking, sleeping and making love.
AP

Now don't get me wrong, I'm all for getting your freak on. It helps to be single or being freaky with your significant other.

Don't Hate the Playa?

2008-01-25T10:50:00.000-06:00

This is an interesting story. Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick appears to have gotten "caught up" as the young folks say. According to my Detroit folks, Mayor Kilpatrick has all the attributes of a playa playa so I am interested to see how this situation pans out.
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Detroit mayor's steamy texting puts him in Clinton-style scandal

PERJURY? | He swore he wasn't having affair with aide

January 25, 2008

BY COREY WILLIAMS

DETROIT -- Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick bristled in the witness chair last year when asked whether he had an affair with a top aide. No, the mayor confidently told jurors, the two were never romantically involved.

But a trove of 14,000 text messages that emerged this week tell a different story: The mayor and his chief of staff carried on a flirty, sometimes sexually explicit dialogue about where to meet and how to conceal their numerous trysts.

'You made me feel so damn good'

The Detroit Free Press obtained nearly 14,000 text messages from the pager of Christine Beatty, chief of staff of Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick, many of which describe a sexual relationship. Excerpts posted on the paper's Web site:

9/28/2002, 11:53 p.m.
Beatty: Where are you now?
Kilpatrick: At home waiting for all [executive protection unit officers] to leave. Where are you?
Beatty: At the residence inn in Madison hgts.
Kilpatrick: What rm?
Beatty: I'm in room 311 in bldg 3 in the back.

10/7/2002, 11:20 p.m.
Beatty: OK, I'm feeling like I want another night like the most recent Saturday at the Residence Inn! You made me feel so damn good that night. As you can see I can't let it go!

10/16/2002, 11:48 p.m.
Kilpatrick: I've been dreaming all day about having you all to myself for 3 days ... relaxing, laughing, talking, sleeping and making love.

Now the mayor's indiscretion has landed him in a Clinton-style scandal that could cost him his job and his law license and even bring perjury charges.

The Detroit Free Press did not explain how it obtained the messages, which were sent or received in 2002-03 from Chief of Staff Christine Beatty's city-issued pager.

The mayor's denial came last summer during testimony in a lawsuit filed by two police officers who alleged they were fired for investigating claims from two former bodyguards that the mayor used his security unit to cover up extramarital affairs.

'Profoundly embarrassing'

On the witness stand, the mayor also went on the offensive about the allegations, defending his reputation and that of Beatty. ''I think it was pretty demoralizing to her ... but it's demoralizing to me as well,'' he testified. ''My mother is a congresswoman. There have always been strong women around me. My aunt is a state legislator. I think it's absurd to assert that every woman that works with a man is a whore.''

Late Wednesday, Kilpatrick issued a more subdued statement. ''These five- and six-year-old text messages reflect a very difficult period in my personal life,'' he said. ''It is profoundly embarrassing to have these extremely private messages now displayed in such a public manner.''

Kilpatrick is married with three children. Beatty was married at the time and has two children.

Last summer's lawsuit ended with the jury awarding $6.5 million to the officers.

Judge Michael Callahan, who presided over the lawsuit, said it is up to prosecutors to decide whether to seek perjury charges against the mayor. The county prosecutor's office declined to comment on Thursday, but scheduled a news conference for today. AP

Surprise! Surprise!

2008-01-24T14:32:00.001-06:00

Actually, this isn't a surprise. This is a relief. If I had gotten a message that Amy Winehouse was found dead (instead of Heath Ledger), I wouldn't have been shocked. I know it's sad but it's true. Her problems with controlled substances are well documented. I hope that she is truly able to get the help she needs. She is a talented artist. In fact, she is one of my daughter's favorites.
----
Amy Winehouse enters drug rehab program

By DAVID STRINGER, Associated Press Writer

Amy Winehouse, beset by allegations of substance abuse, entered a rehabilitation facility Thursday to battle drug addiction.

The announcement came just days after the 24-year-old singer was pictured in British tabloid The Sun inhaling fumes from a small pipe. Police have launched an inquiry into the matter.

"Amy decided to enter the facility today after talks with her record label, management, family and doctors," Universal Music Group said in a statement.

"She has come to understand that she requires specialist treatment to continue her ongoing recovery from drug addiction," the statement said.

Winehouse, who is nominated for six Grammy Awards for her acclaimed "Back to Black" album, seems to be as famous for her drug problems as for her music. Since the album's U.S. release last year, she has canceled a slew of appearances amid reports of drug use.

The album's most popular song, "Rehab," references her struggles, and is a defiant anthem against entering a treatment facility.

"Amy is the most talented and important musical artist of her generation and has made huge strides on her road to recovery," the statement said.

Universal said it hoped Winehouse would "come back to full health and fulfill her incredible potential with the label."

The statement also indicated Winehouse still planned to attend and perform at the Grammys, to be held Feb. 10 in Los Angeles.

She canceled a scheduled appearance Saturday at the NRJ music awards ceremony in France, Universal said.

According to The Sun, video of Winehouse apparently using drugs was shot before she attended a court hearing to see her husband, Blake Fielder-Civil, appear on charges of assault and lying to police.

Winehouse was photographed walking outside her London home last month wearing only a bra and jeans, with no shoes, looking distressed.

Too Little, Too Late?

2008-01-24T13:33:00.001-06:00

Not that I'm one to knock getting a tax rebate. I'm enthusiastically looking forward too it, I wonder if this will really be the shot in the arm that the economy needs.
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Tax rebates deal announced

By ANDREW TAYLOR, Associated Press Writer

Congressional leaders announced a deal with the White House Thursday on an economic stimulus package that would give most tax filers refunds of $600 to $1,200, and more if they have children.

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi said Congress would act on the agreement — hammered out in a week of intense negotiations with Republican Leader John A. Boehner and Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson — "at the earliest date, so that those rebate checks will be in the mail."

The rebates would go to 117 million families, according to a Democratic summary. That includes $28 billion in checks to 35 million working families who wouldn't have been helped by Bush's original proposal, the analysis estimated.

Republicans, for their part, were pleased that the bulk of the rebates — more than 70 percent, according to an analysis by Congress' Joint Tax Committee — would go to individuals who pay taxes.

Individuals who pay income taxes would get up to $600, working couples $1,200 and those with children an additional $300 per child under the agreement. Workers who make at least $3,000 but don't pay taxes would get $300 rebates.

The rebate part of the plan would cost about $100 billion, aides said. The package also includes close to $50 billion in business tax cuts.

The package would allow businesses to immediately write off 50 percent of purchases of plants and other capital equipment and permit small businesses to write off additional purchases of equipment. A Republican-written provision to allow businesses suffering losses now to reclaim taxes previously paid was dropped.

Pelosi, D-Calif., agreed to drop increases in food stamp and unemployment benefits during a Wednesday meeting in exchange for gaining the rebates of at least $300 for almost everyone earning a paycheck, including those who make too little to pay income taxes.

"I can't say that I'm totally pleased with the package, but I do know that it will help stimulate the economy. But if it does not, then there will be more to come," Pelosi said.

Boehner said the agreement "was not easy for the two of us and our respective caucuses." He added, "The two caucuses have to come together and to work in a bipartisan way and to reach a compromise that I think is in the best interest of the American people."

Paulson said he would work with the House and Senate to enact the package as soon as possible because "speed is of the essence."

The Treasury Department has already been talking to the IRS about getting the checks out "as quickly as possible, recognizing that the tax filing season is ongoing," said Treasury spokesman Andrew DeSouza.

The rebates would phase out gradually for individuals whose income exceeds $75,000 and couples with incomes above $150,000, aides said. Individuals with incomes up to $87,000 and couples up to $174,000 would get partial rebates. The caps are higher for those with children.

The agreement left some lawmakers in both parties with a bitter taste, complaining that their leaders had sacrificed too much in the interest of striking a deal. Many senior Democrats were particularly upset that the package omitted the unemployment extension.

"I do not understand, and cannot accept, the resistance of President Bush and Republican leaders to including an extension of unemployment benefits for those who are without work through no fault of their own," Rep. Charles B. Rangel, D-N.Y., the Ways and Means Committee chairman, said in a statement.

Sen. Max Baucus, D-Mont., the Finance Committee Chairman, said leaving out the unemployment extension was "a mistake," as he announced plans to craft a separate stimulus package in the Senate.

EDITED TO ADD:

Stimulus package: What's in and out

By The Associated Press

Congressional leaders have reached a deal with the White house on a bipartisan economic stimulus package that is expected to move swiftly through Congress and give most tax filers rebates of $600 to $1,200.

WHAT'S IN

_Tax rebates: Checks of at least $300 for almost everyone earning a paycheck, including low-income earners who make too little to pay income taxes, so long as they earned at least $3,000 in 2007. Families with children would receive an additional $300 per child, while those paying income taxes could receive higher rebates. The full rebate would be limited to individuals earning $75,000 or less and couples with incomes of $150,000 or less, but a partial rebate would go to individuals earning up to $87,000 and couples earning up to $174,000. The caps are higher for people with children.

_Business tax write-offs: Spurring business investments with so-called bonus depreciation and more generous expensing rules.

_Housing rescue: Allow more subprime mortgage holders to refinance into federally insured loans by raising the limit on Federal Housing Administration loans from $362,000 to as high as $729,750 in expensive areas. Increase the availability of mortgages by providing a one-year boost to the cap on loans that Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac can buy, from $417,000 up to $729,750 in high-cost markets.

WHAT'S OUT

_Permanent tax cuts: Republicans conceded that their top priority would have to be left out.

_Unemployment insurance: Democrats wanted to extend benefits past 26 weeks.

_Food stamps: A boost for benefits.

_Medicaid: Democrats gave up on including Medicaid payments to states.

_Low-income heating subsidies: Democrats are surrendering the fight to include them.

_Infrastructure spending: Spending on transportation or repair projects already under way is off the table.

_Republicans' proposal to allow businesses suffering losses now to reclaim taxes previously paid was dropped.

(This version CORRECTS housing numbers in paragraph 6.) )

New candy bar offers more than just a sugar high

2008-01-24T13:07:00.000-06:00

As if Snickers needed more than peanuts to satisfy, now there's this:
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DENVER – If you thought your kids got a sugar high from other candy bars, wait until they get their hands on this one.

Snickers announced its new candy bar which promises to wallop a kick of energy. No longer just packed with peanuts, the new Snickers Charged also contains caffeine, along with taurine and B-vitamins.

The bar contains 60 milligrams of caffeine. By comparison, it would be about two-thirds the amount of caffeine found in a cup of coffee, which contains about 95 milligrams. The average soft drink has 20 to 30 milligrams of caffeine and an energy drink usually has about 160 milligrams, according to Snickers.

The new candy bar has the same taste as a traditional Snickers, according to officials with the company, and is a low glycemic index food. The company says the new candy bar provides a slower release of energy that has a stable effect on blood sugar.

The new bars will hit selected stores this month.

(Copyright KUSA*TV contributed to this report. Copyright Associated Press, All Rights Reserved)

His Breakup Excuses - Decoded

2008-01-16T13:40:00.001-06:00

I heard the following on the Tom Joyner Morning Show yesterday and I had to post about it. This piece was written by Lisa Lombardi. Lisa is a writer and editor in New York.

How many of us have gotten these lines? How many of them have you given? I hope this is useful information for someone so that you can grow from your newly ended relationship and move on with a clear conscience.
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Here, we reveal what men really mean when they use these five lines.

“It's not you, it's me.” “I need some space.” “It’s a crazy time at work…” Ever wondered what guys are really thinking when they toss out one of those hackneyed breakup lines? To find out, we asked experts and real guys to give it to us straight.

He says: “It’s not you, it’s me.”
Translation: “This means: It is you,” says Scott Haltzman, M.D., a clinical assistant professor of psychiatry at Brown University. “You’re not to his taste, and you might as well move on.” By dusting off this George Costanza classic, he’s trying to soften the blow (as if an amazing woman like you needs the blow softened!). But before you get too steamed, consider this his attempt to shoulder the blame—which he wouldn’t do unless he really respects you, says Rick Blaiser, 31, a writer in New York. “We save this line for girls we consider cool and maybe even want to stay friends with.”

He says: “I need my space.”
Translation: You’re, um, kind of driving him nuts. Yep, he feels smothered, but the good news is it may have absolutely nothing to do with you. “Many men have a fierce independent streak, and when they start to feel that they’re losing their autonomy, they do what any caged animal naturally seeks to do—escape!” says Haltzman. It could be that the relationship is moving too fast emotionally or sexually, or you're seeing each other too often, adds L. Joan Allen, author of Celebrating Single and Getting Love Right. (In some cases, backpedaling and giving him space may ease his relationship claustrophobia.)

Sometimes, however, a guy feels suffocated when you’re not even coming on too strong. “Being in love is a form of losing control,” explains Haltzman. “If your guy’s not used to it, there’s a good chance as he starts to get too close he may feel an instinct to pull away.” (So that explains those dudes who call you three times a day, drop by every night—then tell you you’re crowding them!) This breed of breakup sometimes doesn’t stick, notes Haltzman: “If he’s balking at making a deeper emotional connection, sometimes a little space will change his mind.” So if you’re hoping for a reconciliation, your best bet is to get on with your life—and let him figure out for himself how lonely his life is without you.

He says: “Work is crazy—I don't have time for a relationship right now.”
Translation: He’s just not that into you. Work may be busy, sure. But “if you’re important enough to him, he’ll find a way to fit you into his schedule,” says Haltzman. Lots of important men manage to juggle a job and a relationship: Look at Donald and Melania! Ah-naald and Maria! “Ask yourself this: If Halle Berry came to your guy’s door in the middle of his ‘crazy work schedule,’ would he send her packing?” says Haltzman. “If the answer is ‘no’ then you’ve got to wonder why he could find time for Halle and not you.” You also have beauty, brains, talent—the only thing she has on you are a few stinking statues. If he can’t see your worth, he’s not worthy of you. Next!

He says: “I think we should see other people.”
Translation: He loves sex with you, but he would like it with other women, too. Take it from John Brown, 36, a screenwriter in Los Angeles, who admits to having a “friend” who has pulled this stunt. "When a guy says he thinks you should see other people, he wants to ‘see’ if you'd be willing to let him sleep with other girls, guilt-free," he explains. “He thinks you’re hot—if he didn’t, he’d completely end things—but he doesn’t want all the obligations that come with being your boyfriend.” Ouch! (Remember: John Brown’s just the messenger, people…)

He says: “You're too good for me.”
Translation: He’s a dog—and he knows it. When a guy says you deserve a better boyfriend, run—yes, run—the other way. “Most people overestimate their value,” notes Haltzman. “They think they deserve the raise or to be chosen as the next American Idol. So if a man tells you he’s not worthwhile, he’s probably right.” This bad-news dude is flat-out telling you that he doesn’t put much stock in what it takes to make a relationship work: honesty, trust, little things like fidelity, says Haltzman. Bottom line: “Believe him and thank him for saving you from a lifetime of misery," says Allen.

A Poem About Our Girlfriends

2008-01-16T11:14:00.000-06:00

I don't think we always realize how important our girlfriends are to us. I thought this was great and wanted to share.

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Someone will always be prettier.
Someone will always be smarter.
Some of their houses will be bigger.
Some will drive a better car.
Their children will do better in school.
And their husband will fix more things around the house.
So let it go, and love you and your circumstances.
Think about it!
The prettiest woman in the world can have hell in her heart.
And the most highly favored woman on your job may be unable to have children.
And the richest woman you know, she's got the car, the house, the clothes might be lonely.
"If I have not Love, I am nothing."
So, again, love you.
Love who you are.
Look in the mirror in the morning and smile and say,
"I am too Blessed to be Stressed and too Anointed, to be Disappointed!"
"Winners make things happen, Losers let things happen."
Be "Blessed" Ladies and pass this on to encourage another woman.
"To the world you might be one person, but to the one person you just sent this to, it could mean so much."

New Year, New Look

2008-01-15T13:40:00.000-06:00

I was tired of my current look. I saw some other blogs had nice set-ups and I was jealous. I wanted a nice set-up, too. Thanks to Mia over at The Blog Cafe, I am no longer jealous. Now others can be jealous of me. Let me know what you think. I'm still working out the kinks but overall, I'm tickled pink!

Under construction

2008-01-14T14:39:00.001-06:00

My blog is going to get a facelift so I will be on hiatus for a little bit. It will be interesting to see how this turns out.

Mama Ain't Jokin'

2008-01-09T09:47:00.000-06:00

This is awesome!
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Looks like Mama is going to make him stand out there for a long time!
Ought to be a pretty good lesson, one not easily forgotten! Don't ya think?
He doesn't look very happy, like, maybe the lesson is already working, huh?

Be sure to look at all 3 pictures.

Now this is a seriously strict mom...

Don't mess with her...

We need more parents like her...GO MOM !!!

10 Tips For a Healthy Romantic Relationship

2008-01-04T16:09:00.000-06:00

I didn't write these but I could have. My friend sent them to me from a message board on deephousepage.com. The author goes by the handle "dubfly". Thanks dubfly for your words of wisdom.

COMMUNICATE- Relationships fail because couples talk about their relationship with everyone except one another. Your partner is not a mind reader, so always say what’s on your mind in a manner that will get through to them. Some people need communication to be point blank, most people need a sit down conversation, and others need the delivery to be nice and sweet. Once you know your lover, you’ll know how to communicate with them.
GET WITH SOMEONE ON YOUR LEVEL- Relationships falter when people are on unequal planes. If you’re a lawyer, marrying someone who’s unemployed won’t work. The unemployed person won’t know what your job entails, and will start suspecting that you’re cheating on them, don’t love them, don’t like them, hate them, etc. In reality you don’t have much time for them because you have a significant amount of work to do. This is why entertainers get with entertainers, white-collar workers get with white-collar workers, and blue-collar workers get with blue-collar workers. Your mate must understand what you go through on a daily basis so that jealousy and tension don’t arise. The last thing you need is for your partner to say “ you ain’t shit” because your careers, and ultimately your lifestyles, aren’t parallel. If you work at McDonald’s, find a mate who does something similar to eliminate the jealousy, envy, leeching, and other problems that come with dating above or below your level. Research shows that couples who are on the same level, stay together longer than couples who aren’t, simply because they understand each other’s grind.
KEEP YOURSELF UP- If your mate met you and you looked a certain way, you have an obligation to keep that look up or improve upon your looks. Nobody wants a dime piece to turn into a penny just because they got comfortable and then got sloppy.
HAVE A DATE NIGHT- Whether you’re dating or married, set a night each week where you and your mate can have one on one time. We’re all so busy with functions, kids, work, and friends, that we neglect our partners. Your partner is a priority in your life, and should be treated as such. Schedule a weekly date night where it’s just the TWO of you. Date nights can be dinner and a movie, or it could be a night where the kids are with their grandparents, and you all are in a hotel room with a “DO NOT DISTURB” sign on the door.
SHOW INTEREST IN YOUR PARTNER’S DAY- We are so consumed by our own daily successes and failures that we forget to ask our partner how their day went. Even if you don’t care, just ask!! It will make your partner feel valued, loved, respected, encouraged, and appreciated. Nobody likes conversations that revolve around one person, so stop being selfish and ask your mate how their day went. Try to care about your partner’s day if you currently don’t. I find this hard to do myself, but it’s not all about me in a relationship!!
KNOW WHAT YOUR MATE WANTS OUT OF THE RELATIONSHIP- Does your mate want cohabitation? Does your mate want to casually date? Is your mate looking to tie the knot? Does your mate want to be friends with benefits? You must communicate with your partner about these issues before you catch feelings, and then catch heartbreak. Two major issues couples don’t discuss, is whether they want to get married, and whether they want to have children. By the first or second date these issues should be clarified. If a person’s answers aren’t sufficient for you, move on. One wasted night is better than one wasted year. Often men don’t want to get married, and often women don’t want to have kids. Know what you both want before you officially become an item.
DON’T DISCUSS YOUR EX- Keep the past in the past. Nobody wants to hear about what your ex would have done, did do, or could do for you. Talking about your ex will make your mate jealous and suspicious, and it’s unnecessary. Discuss previous relationships in the beginning of your courtship to clear the air, but until your mate asks you a question regarding your ex, keep your mouth shut. Don’t get a person’s mind ruminating when you don’t have to.
DON’T USE SEX AS A WEAPON- Too many of us use the **** and the ***** as a weapon against our mates. When they upset us, we withhold what they desire most. This is wrong. Talk your issues out. If you’re not in the mood for sex, be upfront about it, but don’t say, “because you forgot to pick up the dry cleaning, you aren’t going to hit it tonight.” Making love is an intimate event, and your genitalia should not be withheld just so you can get revenge on your significant other. If your mate can’t get it from you, they will eventually go elsewhere, and you’ll be to blame. Everyone has sexual urges that need to be fulfilled. Using one’s hand or one’s fingers for a few nights might be ok, but after a week of making your mate self pleasure, consider your relationship a wrap.
HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON- Too many couples get involved with each other based off looks alone, and then realize that they have nothing in common. You may both be on the same level in terms of beauty, but if you have no interests in common the relationship won’t last. If you like to shop all day and your man enjoys going to football games, it won’t last. If your women likes to go to art exhibits on a Friday night and you’d rather sip Old E, the relationship won’t work. If you’re both into sports, the relationship will work. You can go to sporting events together, workout together, plan hiking trips together, shop for sporting equipment together, etc. You must have a lot in common with your mate for your relationship to grow. This includes professional ambitions as well. Are you trying to build an empire, while your mate is comfortable at the glass ceiling? This would be a problem. Know your mate, communicate, and try to have as much in common with them as possible.
DON’T TRY AND CHANGE YOUR MATE- The saying “you can’t turn a hoe into a housewife,” is true. You can’t change people’s personalities to fit a mold that you want to caste them in. If you meet a woman who’s overweight, don’t make her join Weight Watchers just because you think she should shed a few pounds. If you wanted a skinny woman, you could have found one if you looked hard enough. If your man is undereducated when you meet him, don’t force him to go back to school just to impress your family and friends. If you wanted a highly educated man, you could have found one if you stepped up your dating game, and had a little more patience. The point is, none of us wants to be changed by our mates, especially over superficial bullshit. Trying to change your mate will cause resentment, which will ultimately leave your relationship like Michael Jackson’s current career.
Bonus Tip: STAY TRUE TO YOURSELF- Don’t front folks. Always keep it as real as possible. You come first before any other person on earth. Too many of us get so wrapped up in our mates that we lose ourselves in the process. A lot of us are left with nothing when a relationship fizzles. We are left with no friends, because we neglected them to be with our lover. No family, because we cut them off to be with our partner.

Mother apologizes for ‘Hannah Montana’ hoax

2008-01-04T12:52:00.000-06:00

I wasn't going to comment on this story because part of me thinks this is just S.O.S. (stuck on stupid). However, part of me gets really, really angry. What exactly are you teaching your child when she cheats and lies on an essay and wins a fantastic prize? That it's OK to lie and if you get caught all you have to say is sorry? Well I'm sorry because it's not OK and sorry doesn't fix everything. Essentially, this family committed fraud. On top of that they robbed some other deserving child of a well-deserved prize. I'm sure they have learned their lesson but parents the world over can use this as a great example to teach their children about how lies can hurt. OK - soapbox over.

I Believe in Miracles

2008-01-04T12:44:00.000-06:00

If you didn't believe in miracles, here is a reason to do so:

Window washer talking after 47-story fall

Considering most people that fall more than 3 stories have a 50/50 chance of survival, I acknowledge this as an act of God. Nuff said!

Happy New Year!

2007-12-31T21:20:00.000-06:00

I want to take the time to wish you and yours a very happy new year. Let's end 2007 with a bang and enter 2008 on high spirits. I know I will. It's Colby's birthday on the 1st. If we needed a reason to celebrate, we'll always have one. Enjoy your day!

Death

2007-12-18T14:44:00.000-06:00

WHAT A WONDERFUL WAY TO EXPLAIN IT !!!!!

A sick man turned to his doctor,

As he was preparing to leave the examination room and said,

'Doctor, I am afraid to die.

Tell me what lies on the other side.'

Very quietly, the doctor said, 'I don't know.'

'You don't know?

You, a Christian man, do not know what is on the other side?'

The doctor was holding the handle of the door;

On the other side came a sound of scratching and whining,

And as he opened the door,

A dog sprang into the room

And leaped on him with an eager show of gladness.

Turning to the patient, the doctor said,

'Did you notice my dog?

He's never been in this room before.

He didn't know what was inside.

He knew nothing except that his master was here,

And when the door opened, he sprang in without fear.

I know little of what is on the other side of death,

But I do know one thing...

I know my Master is there and that is enough.'

May today there be peace within you.

May you trust God that you are exactly

Where you are meant to be.

I believe that friends are quiet angels who lift us to our feet

When our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.

Just pass this on...

American Gladiators - Redux

2007-12-17T17:15:00.000-06:00

Guess what show is making a comeback on NBC in January? AMERICAN GLADIATORS! Yes, I said it. And I'm really excited about it. If anyone watched the show in the late 80's and 90's, I hope you share my enthusiasm. I'm not ashamed to admit that I wanted to be an American Gladiator when I was younger. Now I know better. Those people got their butts kicked. Of course I was in much better shape then so I might have been able to hold my own but 3 kids later I'm fat and flabby and watching from the couch.

Week 254

2007-12-17T11:57:00.000-06:00

Interview :: Phone

Army :: Marines

Unwrap :: Gifts

Evolve :: Mutate

Bus :: Exhaust

The real thing :: Baby

Streak :: Nekkid

Gorge :: Overeat

Spicy :: Hot

Course :: 10 part meal

Hot NEKKID Men for Christmas

2007-12-14T17:56:00.001-06:00

I've posted about this in the past and I'm going to post about it again.

Ladies (and those men so inclined) check out Rundu for the latest 2008 calendars. I have one from 2003 and I will NEVER throw it away. These men are hot. She not only has classicly posed (and foine) half-nekkid men, but now she has classicly posed (and foine) nekkid men. 2 different calendars for 2008 AND a DVD. How is a girl to choose? Do I actually need to? Talk about a stocking stuffer. He He He (that's my pimp laugh). Enjoy!

Friday Funny

2007-12-14T09:53:00.000-06:00

Just in time for the weekend. Enjoy!

Bubba died in a fire and his body was burned pretty badly. The morgue needed someone to identify the body, so they sent for his two best friends, Cooter and Gomer. The three men had always done everything together. Cooter arrived first, and when the mortician pulled back the sheet, Cooter said, "Yup, his face is burned up pretty bad. You better roll him over."

The mortician rolled him over and Cooter said, "Nope, ain't Bubba."

The mortician thought this was rather strange. So he brought Gomer in, to confirm the identity of the body. Gomer looked at the body and said, "Yup, he's pretty well burnt up. Roll him over."

The mortician rolled him over and Gomer said, "No, it ain't Bubba."

The mortician asked, "How can you tell?"

Gomer said, "Well, Bubba had two assholes."

"What? He had two assholes?" asked the mortician.

"Yup, we never seen 'em, but everybody used to say, "There's Bubba with them two assholes."

Holiday Cookie Recipes

2007-12-13T10:24:00.000-06:00

The holidays are just around the corner, this might be handy to have! This is remarkable! Even if you have no particular interest, please pass on to the bakers in your life. They'll appreciate it. Just click on the name of the cookie and bam the recipe is there. Good to keep handy

1-2-3 Cookies 7 Layer Cookies Allie Nelson's Famous Snickerdoodle Cookies Almond Crescent Shortbread Amish Sugar Cookies Andies Candies Cookies Angel Crisps Angenets Applesauce Cookies Apricot Fold-Overs Aunt Edy's Molasses Crinkles Auntie Linda's Ginger Gems Bakeless Dream Cookies Banana Drop Cookies Best Chocolate Chip Cookies in the World Biscotti Biscotti Blueberry Cookies Boiled Chocolate Oatmeal Drop Cookies Bronwnies Brown Sugar Shortbread Brownie Cookies Brownie Delight Brownies Buccaneer Snowballs Buried Cherry Cookies Butter Cookies Butter Nut Balls Butterballs Butterscotch Haystacks C.O.P. Cookies Candy Cane Cookies Candy Cookies Caramel Shortbread Cheesecake Brownies Cherry Buns Cherry Crowns Cherry Winks Chewies Chewy Noels Chinese Chews/Haystacks Chocolate Chip Cookie Bars Chocolate Chip Cookies Chocolate Chip Meltaways Chocolate Chip Peanut Butter Cookies Chocolate Christmas Trees Chocolate Cream Cheese Squares Chocolate Crinkles Chocolate Mint Snow-Top Cookies Chocolate Oatmeal Cookies (no bake) Chocolate Snowball Cookies Chocolate Streusel Bars Chocolate Sundae Cookies Chocolate Walnut Crumb Bars Choco-Scotch Crunchies Choose A Cookie Dough Recipe Christmas Crackers Christmas Crunch Bars Christmas Ginger Snaps Christmas Macaroons Christmas Mice Cookies Christmas Shaped Cookies Church Window Cookies Coconut Cookies Congo Squares Cookie in a Jar Corn Flakes Cookies Cornflake Christmas Wreaths Cowboy Cookies (oatmeal) Cream Cheese Cookies with Apricot Filling CrÃ¨me De Menthe Chocolate Squares CrÃ¨me Wafers Crescent Cookies Crispy Crunchies Date Nut Balls Date-nut Pinwheel Cookies Diabetic Peanut Butter Cookies Disgustingly Rich Brownies Doodles Double chocolate chip cookies Double-Chocolate Crinkles Eatmore Cookies Eggnog Cookies Elizabeth's Sugar Cookies Elves Quick Fudge Brownies Emily Dickinson's Gingerbread Cookie Recipe Emily's Best Brownies Famous Oatmeal Cookies Firemen Cookies Fluffy Shortbread Cookies Forgotten Cookies Frosted Peanut Butter Brownies Fruit Cake Cookies Fruitcake Squares Fry Pan Cookies Gems Ginger Cookies Ginger Crinkles Gingerbread Baby Gingerbread Cookies with Butter Cream Icing Gingerbread Men Gingerbread Men Ginny's Gluten Free Chocolate Chip Cookies Glory's Golden Graham Squares Glory's Sugar Cookies Gramma Chapman's chocolate coconut drops Grandma Elsie's Zimt (cinnamon) Cookies Grandma J's Butter Cookies Grandma Olson's Parkay Cookies Great Grandmothers Sugar Cookies Gum Drop Cookies Gumdrop Gems Haystack Cookies Ho-Ho Bars Holiday Cereal Snaps Holiday Chocolate Butter Cookies Holiday Raisin Walnut Bars Holly Cookies Hungarian Cookies (Little Nut Rolls) Ice Box Cookies Irresistible Peanut Butter Cookies Italian Cookies Jacob's Peppermint Snowballs Jam Bars Jessica's Famous Brownies Jessie's Chocolate Chip Cookies Jubilee Jumbles Juliet's Peanut Butter Blossoms Jumbo Chocolate Chip Cookies Kentucky Colonels Kiefle (cream cheese cookies with jam filling) Kifflings Kiss Cookies Lacy Swedish Almond Wafers Lemon Angel Bar Cookies Lemon Bars Lemon Cake Cookies Lemon Cream Cheese Cookies Lemon Squares Linzer Tarts Log Cabin Cookies Luscious Lemon Squares M&M Cookies Magic Cookie Bars Melt in Your Mouth Cutout Sugar Cookies Melting Shortbread Meme's Cream Cheese Cookies Milk Chocolate Florentine Cookies Mincemeat Cookies Mincemeat Goodies Molasses Cookies Molasses Forest Cookies Molasses Sugar Cookies Mom Mom's Crescent Cookies Mom-Mom's Ginger Cookies Mom's Nutmeg Sugar Cookies Mom's Old Fashion "Puffy" Sugar Cookies Monster Cookies Moravian Christmas Cookies Nana's Famous Soft Southern Cookies Nitey Nite Cookies No Bake Chocolate Cookies No Bake Chocolate Oatmeal Cookies No Bake Cookies No Bake Cookies No Bake Peanut Butter Cookies No-Bake Chocolate Oatmeal Cookies No-Bake Cookies Norwegian Sugar Cookies Nut Balls Oatmeal Bars Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Nut Cookies Oatmeal Coconut Crisps Oatmeal Cookies Oatmeal Scotchies Old Fashioned Sugar Cookies Ooey Gooey Caramel Chocolate Dunk Ooey Gooey Squares Orange Slice Cookies Parking Lot Cookies Peanut Blossoms Peanut Butter Bars Peanut Butter Blossoms Peanut Butter Cereal Cookies Peanut Butter Chewies Peanut Butter Chocolate Bars Peanut Butter Cookies Peanut Butter Cookies Peanut butter fingers Peanut Butter Reindeer Peanut Butter Surprises Peanut Marshmallow Cookies Pecan Puff Cookies Peppermint Snowballs Peppernuts Persimmon Cookies Persimmon Cookies Petey's Yummy Spicy Almond Thins Pfeffernuesse Pffefferneuse Cookies Pineapple Filled Cookies Pizzelles Potato Chip Cookies Potato Flake Cookies Praline Cookies Praline Strips Pterodactyl Nests Pumpkin Bars Pumpkin Bars Pumpkin Chip Cookies Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Cookies Pumpkin Cookies Queen Biscuits Quick Cookies Raised Sugar Cookies Raisin Filled Oatmeal Bars Raspberry Meringue Bars Really Peanutty Butter Cookies Reese`s Brownies Reese's Peanut Butter Bars

The Parents who Drugged Us

2007-12-12T10:32:00.001-06:00

The other day, someone at a store in our town read that a Methamphetamine lab
had been found in an old farmhouse in the adjoining county
and he asked me a rhetorical question.
"Why didn't we have a drug problem when you and I were growing up?"
I replied, I did have a drug problem when I was young:
I was drug to church on Sunday morning.
I was drug to church for weddings and funerals.
I was drug to family reunions and community
socials no matter the weather.
I was drug by my ears when I was disrespectful to adults.
I was also drug to the woodshed when I
disobeyed my parents, told a lie, brought home a bad report
card, did not speak with respect, spoke ill of the teacher or the
preacher, or if I didn't put forth my best effort
in everything that was asked of me.
I was drug to the kitchen sink to have my
mouth washed out with soap if I uttered a profanity
I was drug out to pull weeds in mom's garden
and flower beds and cockleburs out of dad's fields.
I was drug to the homes of family, friends,
and neighbors to help out some poor soul who had no one
to mow the yard, repair the clothesline, or chop some firewood; and,
if my mother had ever known that I took a single dime as a tip for
this kindness, she would have drug me back to the woodshed.
Those drugs are still in my veins and they affect my
behavior in everything I do, say, or think. They are
stronger than cocaine, crack, or heroin; and,
if today's children had this kind of drug problem,
America would be a better place.

God bless the parents who drugged us.

Christmas Dinner

2007-12-11T13:47:00.000-06:00

My parents are going out of town this holiday season to visit my stepfather's family in the much-warmer south. As a result, I will be cooking Christmas Dinner. In an effort to put a delicious and easy meal together, I visited foodnetwork.com for inspiration. I've run across TOO many choices. However they do have some Christmas menus. Right now I'm leaning towards the Festive Christmas Brunch. What are some of your favorite Christmas/holiday foods?

Looking for a Job?

2007-12-06T17:08:00.000-06:00

14,000 Jobs Available With Union Pacific Railroad.

IF YOU KNOW ANYONE LOOKING FOR A JOB, PASS THIS ALONG, LET'S GET OUR PEOPLE WORKING.

Union Pacific is Hiring 3000 to 5000 people to fill all jobs for people retiring this year. They will do all the training for 14 weeks. 35k to 40k per year salary to start.

They're looking for people to fill positions all over the United States. So, if you know anyone who needs work let them know, they can apply online or go to one of the job fairs in their area. It's also online for locations and times...http://www.unionpacificjobs.com/

Great Quote

2007-12-05T14:38:00.000-06:00

"If A is success in life, then A equals X plus Y plus Z. Work is X; Y is play; and Z is keeping your mouth shut."

--Albert Einstein,
German-born Swiss-American physicist

North American Union and VChip Truth

2007-12-05T10:38:00.000-06:00

Take a look at the video below.

Has anyone heard about this? This is definitely something that more information is needed. This is a prime example of why you can not/should not depend on the media as your primary source of news. You need to use that as a starting point and get to the meat of the situation yourself. A quick Google search yields lots of starting info. This is so crazy that we can talk about Britney day and night but things that really matter - like civil liberties - fall by the wayside.

Cookie Rehab

2007-11-29T17:08:00.000-06:00

I am selling Girl Scout cookies for my daughter (November 30 is the deadline btw). I have done the diligent thing and sent emails out to friends and family. This response is by far the best.
---

Dear Cookie Dealer,

I received your e-mail concerning cookies. That was a low blow. It's bad enough I have to be confronted by certain members of your organization upon the street. Now I am being accosted by ads in the privacy of my own home. I think your tactics are vile and underhanded. As such I will be needing six boxes of your finest Thin Mints no make that ten, yes I think ten will be sufficient. You will receive your just recompense upon our next meeting.

Good day to you madam

Long Time No Talk

2007-11-26T13:06:00.000-06:00

Sorry for the sudden disappearance. I've had a busy few weeks. My grandmother passed away November 9 so I was busy dealing with life and now I have a sinus infection. Needless to say, I ate my Thanksgiving dinner (for which I was very thankful among other things) but I didn't taste it. Sigh! As they say life goes on and so do I. What are you thankful for this year?

On another note, Mia is selling Girl Scout Cookies. Want some? Let me know.

Another One Bites the Dust

2007-11-13T10:41:00.000-06:00

Shasta has decided to take an undetermined break from blogging. I know the feeling. At least she let her readers know that she is going on hiatus. I just stopped writing. You know what? Life happens. Everyone blogs for different reasons. I think when you are blogging and those reasons aren't being met, it's time to stop. All I can say is that I will miss reading Miss Shasta MacNasty. What a strange trip it truly has been...

Week 249

2007-11-12T10:17:00.001-06:00

Treadmill :: Exercise

Stroke :: Brain needs oxygen

Exclusively :: Mine

Lash :: Eye

Red carpet :: Glamour

Credit card:: Debt

Points :: Game

Domestic :: Goddess

21 :: Legal

Inject :: Shot

10 RULES FOR THANKSGIVING DINNER AT MY HOUSE

2007-11-08T18:39:00.000-06:00

I've received this numerous times. I had to post. It's hilarious and TRUE! Follow these rules for a stress free Thanksgiving Dinner whether it's at your house or someone else's. Better yet, print and give copy to each guest that enters your home.

Don't get in line asking questions about the food. "Who made the potato salad? Is it egg in there? Are the greens fresh? Is the meat in the greens turkey or pork? Who made the macaroni and cheese? What kind of pie is that? Who made it? Ask one more question and I will punch you in your mouth, knocking out all your fronts so you won't be able to eat anything.
If you can't walk or are missing any limbs, sit your ass down until someone makes your plate for you. Dinner time is not the time for you to be independent. Nibble on them damn pecans and walnuts to hold you over until someone makes you a plate.
If you have kids under the age of twelve, I will escort their little asses to the basement and bring their food down to them. They are not gonna tear my damn house up this year. Tell them that they are not allowed upstairs until it's time for Uncle Butchie to start telling family stories about their mommas and papas. If they come upstairs for any reason except for that they are bleeding to death, I will break a foot off in their asses!
There is going to be one prayer for Thanksgiving dinner! JUST ONE! We do not care that you are thankful that your 13 year old daughter gave birth to a healthy baby or your nephew just got out of jail. Save that talk for somebody who gives a damn. The time limit for the prayer is one minute. If you are still talking after that one minute is up, you will feel something hard come across your lips and they will be swollen for approximately 20 minutes.
Finish everything on your plate before you go up for seconds! If you don't, you will be cursed out and asked to stay your greedy ass home next year!
BRING YOUR OWN TUPPERWARE!! Don't let me catch you fixing yourself a plate in my good Tupperware knowing damn well that I will never see it again! Furthermore, if you didn't bring anything over, don't let me catch you making a plate period or it will be a misunderstanding.
What you came with is what you should leave with!! Do not leave my house with anything that doesn't belong to you. EVERYBODY WILL BE SUBJECTED TO A BODY SEARCH COMING AND GOING OUT OF MY DOMAIN!!!
Do not leave your kids so you can go hopping from house to house. This is not a DAYCARE CENTER ! There will be a kid-parent roll call every ten minutes. Any parent that is not present at the time of roll call, your child will be put outside until you come and get him or her. After 24 hours, I will call DCFS on your ignorant ass!!
BOOK YOUR HOTEL ROOM BEFORE YOU COME INTO TOWN!! There will be no sleeping over at my house! You are to come and eat dinner and take your ass home or to your hotel room. EVERYBODY GETS KICK THE HELL OUT AT 11:00 pm. You will get a 15 minute warning bell ring.
Last but not least! ONE PLATE PER PERSON!! This is not a soup kitchen. I am not trying to feed your family until Christmas dinner! You will be supervised when you fix your plate. Anything over the appropriate amount will be charged to you before you leave. There will be a cash register at the door. Thanks to Cousin Alfred and his greedy ass family, we now have a credit card machine! So VISA and MASTERCARD are now being accepted. NO FOOD STAMPS OR ACCESS CARDS YET!

Ways to Reduce Stress

2007-11-07T10:20:00.000-06:00

I have some personal things going on that really have me down. Feels like the weight of the world on my shoulders. My friend sent me this and I felt A LOT better. I felt so much better I wanted to share. Here you go. Enjoy!
------------
Never borrow from the future. If you worry about what may happen tomorrow and it doesn't happen, you have worried in vain. Even if it does happen, you have to worry twice.

Pray
Go to bed on time.
Get up on time so you can start the day unrushed.
Say No to projects that won't fit into your time schedule, or that will compromise your mental health
Delegate tasks to capable others.
Simplify and unclutter your life.
Less is more. (Although one is often not enough, two are often too many.)
Allow extra time to do things and to get to places.
Pace yourself. Spread out big changes and difficult projects over time; don't lump the hard things all together.
Take one day at a time.
Separate worries from concerns. If a situation is a concern, find out what God would have you do and let go of the anxiety . If you can't do anything about a situation, forget it.
Live within your budget; don't use credit cards for ordinary purchases.
Have backups; an extra car key in your wallet, an extra house key buried in the garden, extra stamps, etc.
K.M.S. (Keep Mouth Shut). This single piece of advice can prevent an enormous amount of trouble.
Do something for the Kid in You everyday.
Carry a Bible with you to read while waiting in line.
Get enough rest.
Eat right.
Get organized so everything has its place.
Listen to a tape while driving that can help improve your quality of life.
Write down thoughts and inspirations.
Every day, find time to be alone.
Having problems? Talk to God on the spot. Try to nip small problems in the bud. Don't wait until it's time to go to bed to try and pray.
Make friends with Godly people.
Keep a folder of favorite scriptures on hand.
Remember that the shortest bridge between despair and hope is often a good "Thank you Jesus."
Laugh.
Laugh some more!
Take your work seriously, but not yourself at all.
Develop a forgiving attitude (most people are doing the best they can).
Be kind to unkind people (they probably need it the most).
Sit on your ego.
Talk less; listen more.
Slow down.
Remind yourself that you are not the general manager of the universe.
Every night before bed, think of one thing you're grateful for that you've never been grateful for before. GOD HAS A WAY OF TURNING THINGS AROUND FOR YOU. "If God is for us, who can be against us?" (Romans 8:31)

Week 248

2007-11-05T13:36:00.000-06:00

Assets :: Illegal

Concern :: Are you OK?

Over the top :: Say Whaaa?

Supplies :: School

Mustache :: Handlebar

Doug :: The Cartoon

Coach :: Craig T. Nelson

Bleachers :: Bums

Stripes :: Stars

Assortment :: Candy

NSBE on Bravo

2007-11-05T10:37:00.000-06:00

I am an alumni member of the National Society of Black Engineers (NSBE). As a proud member of Region IV (Fo' Solid!) - the Mother Region since 1992, this featurette of NSBE on Bravo makes me especially proud. I actually know all the featured speakers in this video. WOW!

Here's a little more about the video:
"The Profile Series" broadcast of the National Society of Black Engineers aired on Bravo nationwide on Thursday, October 25, 2007, as sponsored educational programming.

"The Profile Series" seeks to inform, educate and enlighten its international audience by "profiling the best and brightest." NSBE, with more than 26,000 members, is one of the largest student-managed organizations in the country. This profile will outline the achievements NSBE has made since its inception, in the academic and professional advancement of its members and the improvement of black communities in the U.S. and abroad.

For those of you that don't know the mission of NSBE is "to increase the number of culturally responsible black engineers, who excel academically, succeed professional and positively impact the community."

National Black Out Day Redux

2007-11-01T14:48:00.000-05:00

National Blackout Day is a H.O.T. topic and I'm glad of it. It's definitely sparked some dialogue. Of the commentaries that I have read so far, I find the I like Roland Martin's best. To sum it up, actions speak louder than words. I think that has been my hang up with this initiative. We are talking about this day but will there be more than talk? Will there be participation? Will there be action? Based on some of the comments I have received, there will be action and concerted action is the recipe for change. This is really starting to get exciting...

Week 247

2007-10-30T11:58:00.001-05:00

Inaugural :: Address

Pledge :: of Allegience

String :: of Pearls

Trot :: Fox

Fitness :: Center

Cinder :: Block

Edge :: Line

31 :: and loving it

Blue :: Moon

Leather :: Pants

Critics

2007-10-26T10:27:00.000-05:00

I work in advertising. Presenting creative to the client can be an adventure. This cartoon pretty much sums up bad feedback...

National Black Out Day - Friday November 2, 2007

2007-10-24T11:29:00.000-05:00

While I don't agree with everything said below, I do believe in getting the word out and letting people decide a course of action for themselves. Honestly, a one-day boycott is not going to have much of an impact. I believe a true boycott needs to last over a period of time (i.e. a week) for any impact to be felt. For businesses and the government to truly get an idea that the boycotters are serious. Look how long the bus boycott lasted before a change was made. This is one small step. Maybe it will build momentum to a bigger movement.
---------

Many people marched in Jena, LA last month in support of the 6 young men unjustly charged with attempted murder for a school yard fight. There are many situations all over the nation that scream of injustice and unfair treatment of people in this country. There is the woman in West Virginia who was raped and tortured for days with barely any national coverage. They called her the N-word but as of this writing, they still had not confirmed they are treating this as a hate crime. We all know the young groom in NYC who was murdered by the NYPD on the eve of his wedding. There is the teenage girl in Texas who was sentenced to jail time for an altercation with a school official. How about the teenage girl who was sprayed with mace for missing curfew? You can see her in the video restrained by a police officer twice her size. She was in handcuffs when she was sprayed. Maybe you heard of the California girl who had her arm broken by a school security official when she refused to pick up a piece of cake from the floor. It was filmed by a school mate and is all over You Tube. You may have heard of the young man in Georgia who was sentenced to 10 years in prison for having consensual sex with a young girl. He was 17, she was 15. There was also the young brother in Florida who died in the custody of the state when he was admitted to their boot camp. They said he had diabetes but they couldn't explain his battered body. All of these stories happened within the last year or two.

Those are just a few instances where people in this country have been treated unfairly, while 4 young men in Raleigh, NC sue the state for 10 million dollars each because they were "falsely" accused of rape. There are people who spend YEARS in prison and are exonerated that don't get nearly that much coin. By the way, who else is tired of the Princess Diana wrongful death inquiry? I mean, come on, it's very sad how she died but does her death need to be the top news story 10 years and 2 months after her death?

On Friday, November 2, 2007, Warren Ballentine, Reverend Al Sharpton and other civil rights leaders are calling for a national boycott. Black people alone spend 2 billion dollars a day in the United States and we are only approximately 12% of the population. 2 billion dollars a day, lining the pockets of companies that have shown no interest in our interests. We ARE living in the new civil rights movement. We cannot allow the march in Jena to be only an event. It MUST be a movement. In the 1950s, the bus boycott was only supposed to be for a few days or weeks. It ended up being over a year. The goal was for fair treatment and bus integration. Our parents and grandparents sacrificed and showed that with faith and strength, they could show corporate America the power of the community and demanded fair treatment. As we know, those buses were integrated. This is not about color. This is about class. The middle class and poor people in this country are not treated as the Declaration of Independence says we should be treated. It states that "all men are created equal". Clearly the governing class of the United States disagrees with their document.

Join us on on Friday, November 2, 2007 and don't spend ANY money. If you have to shop, do it the day before or the day after. If you need gas, get it the day before or the day after. We have to join together as a community. You may be thinking, it's only one day, what difference will it make? I had the same thought at first, but just think about it. If we all save our money that day, it WILL make a difference. That day may become a weekend. That weekend may become a week and that week a month. As we showed in the 1950s, we can make a difference if we do this together.

Serious Gaming Starts at 6

2007-10-23T12:23:00.000-05:00

As if parents didn't have enough to worry about, now we need to worry about this? I wonder if the number increases if both parents are serious gamers. Not that I'm hard-core myself but I am addicted to Yahoo Games and I have a desktop full of 1-hr downloads. Chris on the other hand is a hard-core gamer both online and offline (Halo, anyone?) so that makes me wonder how our children will fare in the long-run.

Fight for Kisses

2007-10-23T11:53:00.000-05:00

Shasta previously blogged about Fight for Kisses but I have to do a redux because Miles totally cock-blocked his father last night when Chris came in for a kiss. And when he did it, the first thing that came to mind was this website. Do not skip the trailer. Hilarious and now surprisingly true...

Week 246

2007-10-22T12:45:00.000-05:00

Las Vegas :: What Happens There, Stays There

Linus :: Lucy

Struck :: Moon

Movie :: Mayhem

Anxious :: Can't Wait

Bandit :: Brown-Eyed

Picks :: Chooses

Lasso :: Lassie

Dinner :: And a Movie

Bargain :: Deal

Does Size Matter?

2007-10-19T11:49:00.000-05:00

When presented with this question, women are so polite that it's funny. We always say:

No, it doesn't matter.
I love him no matter what the size.
It's the motion in the ocean not the size of the boat.

What a crock! Of course size matters. Doesn't anyone remember the song "Short Dick Man"? Well no one wants one even if they won't say so out loud. If this video is any indication, that attitude has not/will not change...

glumbert - Does size matter?

Week 245

2007-10-15T10:52:00.000-05:00

Illicit :: Thoughts

Go :: Do not pass

Jacket :: Down

Blow :: Me

Coach :: Pump Up

Effort :: Good

Leadership :: Bad

Snore :: Loudly

Fearless :: Crazy

Network :: Computer

Co-Workers

2007-10-10T09:48:00.000-05:00

We all know at least one of these. We are probably one of them ourselves. If nothing else, the pictures are amusing...

VH1 Hip Hop Honors

2007-10-09T11:25:00.001-05:00

Who watched the VH1 Hip Hop Honors last night? If you didn't see it then you missed something. I was busy being supermom (cooking dinner, combing hair, determining if it was indeed garbage night - it was) when I got home and forgot and missed the opening. I was pretty bummed about that since the show opened with the tribute to Missy Elliot. However for the most part the show was AWESOME! The honorees took me back to high school/college. I mean Missy Elliot, Snoop Dogg, WHODINI, New Jack Swing (Teddy Riley and Andre Harrell), A Tribe Called Quest and the movie Wild Style (Charlie Ahearn and Fab Five Freddy). What?!

Missy Elliot is a visionary. My daughter loves her. I love her. She always gets bumped on the car radio. Nuff Said!

Snoop Dogg came out when I was in high school. I thought he was so cute in Nuthin' but a G Thang with Dr. Dre. Had the curly hi-top fade, sparse facial hair, bedroom eyes. I.LOVED.Snoop. As in, I-could-have-ripped-off-his-clothes-and-humped-him love. Surprisingly, I was messing around with someone at the time that looked like Snoop. Unfortunately for him, he got no ass from me. Looking like doesn't equal. Funny how the memories come back and you remember where you where when...Oh and the performance was pretty good on the show too.

WHODINI not only has a classic look - they have classics. Friends, Freaks Come Out At Night, One Love...need I say more.

New Jack Swing honored Teddy Riley and Andre Harrell. Yes Teddy Riley who doesn't look like he has aged at all. The performance was poppin! Doug E. Fresh opened up and beatboxed his way into my core and made me jump off the couch with my fist in the air. That stroll down memory lane was much appreciated.

Finally - A Tribe Called Quest was honored. When Busta Rhymes burst out the back of the stage on Scenario I pretty much lost it. I had the chance to see them in concert when I was in college and didn't go. I had some other dumb shit to do - homework, study for an exam something. I have always regretted not going. Seeing them perform last night re-cemented that regret. Sigh!

Now of these, I'm least familiar with Wild Style. It's the 25th anniversary of the movie and that means I was only 8 when it came out. However in the spirit of all things really hip hop - not rap, hip hop - that will be next on the NetFlicks queue.

All in all, VH1 did a great job and Tracy Morgan as the host knows his hip hop. Thank God for Tivo so I can watch the good parts again and again.

See How Rich You Are

2007-10-08T16:10:00.000-05:00

When you feel that you've got money issues, just use this website to see how you stack against others in the world: Global Rich List.

Week 244

2007-10-08T09:59:00.000-05:00

Cluster :: F**k

Announcement :: Good News

Respect :: Queen of Soul

Incident :: Happening

Accordion :: Polka

Drunk :: Driving

If :: Not Now, When?

Dexter :: St. Jacques

Wedding :: Flowers

Gambling :: Debt

Truth in Advertising

2007-10-03T16:59:00.000-05:00

One evening a husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife "Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in Slim Fast. Maybe it would take a few inches off of your butt!!"

His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn't let such a comment go unrewarded.

The next morning the husband took a pair of underwear out of his drawer. "What the Hell is this??" he said to himself as a little "dust" cloud appeared when he shook them out.

"April," he hollered into the bathroom, "Why did you put talcum powder in my underwear?"
She replied with a snicker..."It's not talcum powder......It's 'Miracle Grow'."

The Centipede

2007-10-03T16:41:00.000-05:00

This guy was lonely and so he decided... life would be more fun if he had a pet. So he went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet. After some discussion he finally bought a centipede, (100 leg bug), which came in a little white box to use for his house.

He took the box home, found a good location for the box, and decided he would start off by taking his new pet to the bar for a drink. So he asked the centipede in the box, 'Would you like to go to Frank's place with me and have a beer?'

But there was no answer from his new Pet. This bothered him a bit, but he waited a few minutes and then asked him again, How about going to the bar and having a drink with me?' But again there was no answer from his new friend and pet.

So he waited a few minutes more, thinking about the situation. He decided to ask him one more time. This time putting his face up against the centipede's house and shouting, 'Hey, in there! Would you like to go to Frank's place and have a drink with me?'

A little voice came out of the box: 'I heard you the first time! I'm putting my fucking shoes on!'

Saying Grace in a Restaurant

2007-10-01T18:39:00.000-05:00

I always tell my children to say their grace before they eat so I thought this was a great story.
---------
Last week, I took my children to a restaurant. My six-year-old son asked if he could say grace.

As we bowed our heads he said, "God is good, God is great. Thank you for the food, and I would even thank you more if Mom gets us ice cream for dessert. And Liberty and justice for all! Amen!"

Along with the laughter from the other customers nearby, I heard a woman remark, "That's what's wrong with this country. Kids today don't even know how to pray. Asking God for ice cream! Why, I never!"

Hearing this, my son burst into tears and asked me, "Did I do it wrong? Is God mad at me?"

As I held him and assured him that he had done a terrific job, and God was certainly not mad at him, an elderly gentleman approached the table.

He winked at my son and said, "I happen to know that God thought that was a great prayer."

"Really?" my son asked.

"Cross my heart," the man replied.

Then, in a theatrical whisper, he added (indicating the woman whose remark had started this whole thing), "Too bad she never asks God for ice cream. A little ice cream is good for the soul sometimes." Naturally, I bought my kids ice cream at the end of the meal. My son stared at his for a moment, and then did something I will remember the rest of my life. He picked up his sundae and, without a word, walked over and placed it in front of the woman. With a big smile he told her, "Here, this is for you. Ice cream is good for the soul sometimes; and my soul is good already."

Missing Woman Found

2007-10-01T18:08:00.000-05:00

This is a sad end to a story that you hoped would be different. Courtesy of the Chicago Tribune. My prayers go out to the family who always trusted in God and never gave up hope.
--
chicagotribune.com

Body identified as Nailah Franklin's

Chicago police confirm it is that of missing woman's

By Angela Rozas and Monique Garcia

Tribune staff reporters

6:50 PM CDT, September 28, 2007

Dental records today identified the badly decomposed body of a woman found early Thursday in south suburban Calumet City as that of Nailah Franklin, the 28-year-old pharmaceutical representative reported missing more than a week ago, Chicago police said.

A woman's body was discovered naked and partially buried in a densely wooded area behind a vacant store about 4:45 a.m. Thursday by two Calumet City police officers on routine patrol, said police and a law enforcement source.

An autopsy was performed today on the badly decomposed body. Police, who are now conducting a death investigation, said the cause of death is "inconclusive."

Franklin's family released a statement about 4 p.m. today read by Rev. Stacey Edwards-Dunn outside the family's Chicago home.

"This statement confirms that the body found yesterday in Calumet City is that of Nailah Franklin. It was confirmed by dental records earlier today. The family would like to express its deepest gratitude to Chicago, Calumet City and other police departments plus the FBI agents, who so diligently worked to find Nailah. We would also like to thank the news media for coverage of Nailah's search.

"And very importantly, they expressed their thanks to the community for their search efforts, prayers and heartfelt expressions," the statement said.

The body was discovered after police officers noticed something unusual in the parking lot of the building and decided to investigate, said Calumet City Police Chief Russell Larson.

Larson would not say what it was that piqued the officers' interest.

"They paid attention to a very minute detail that most people would have walked past," Larson said.

A law enforcement source said it was ear buds from a portable music device.

Police had been combing the Calumet City area where the body was found since Saturday morning, when Franklin's company vehicle, a Chevrolet Impala, was found in nearby Hammond.

"Personal items" of hers then were discovered near an abandoned building not far from where the body eventually was found. On Wednesday, police used FBI equipment to go back over the area but didn't find anything.

Franklin, who worked for Eli Lilly & Co. and lived near the University of Illinois at Chicago campus, was reported missing after she didn't show up for a work meeting Sept. 19. Text messages from her phone on Sept. 18 said she was going to dinner and would call her family and boss back, but they never heard from her.

Police said Franklin told them a week prior to being reported missing that a man she briefly dated had been threatening her life, and she filed a police report. Police have talked to the man, who a law enforcement source said came with an attorney. But they have not named him as a suspect in her disappearance.

"Please continue sending your thoughts and prayers during this sorrowful time," the family statement said. "As they move forward, the family asks that you respect this time of mourning as they plan the celebration of Nailah's life—their sister, their daughter, their aunt, and their friend. She will be greatly be missed by all."

arozas@tribune.com

mcgarcia@tribune.com

Week 243

2007-10-01T17:59:00.000-05:00

Crook :: O' Shit

Career :: Woman

Freckles :: Red-Head

Scramble :: Quarterback Blitz

Mistake :: Erase

Telephone :: Hello

Thank you :: You're Welcome

Obstruction :: of Justice

24/7 :: All day, every day

SciFi :: Horror

Reading to Kids...

2007-09-25T11:26:00.000-05:00

In case you are in the giving mood, I'm posting this for Matthew Jones aka Wes from General Hospital aka My Hero...
----
Yes, it's the time of year when all the charitable requests come out - hopefully mine is one of the first...

As most of you know, every year we set out to raise money for Reading to Kids during our annual fund drive. For those of you who are new to my annual plea, Reading to Kids is a grassroots organization dedicated to inspiring children with a love of reading. We're currently serving seven different elementary schools around the Los Angeles area. Most of these kids speak English as a second language and don't have age-appropriate book sat home. But every month, they come out to our reading clubs because they have a passion for reading and they've grown to love the program. If you live in LA and haven't come to a reading club, I REALLY encourage you to come out and join us - but that's another email.

We've enjoyed a lot of growth and expansion in 2007 - reaching out to three additional schools and increasing our volunteer base. But to keep our success going, we need your help. I'm asking you to make a donation to Reading to Kids - it doesn't matter if you can give $10 or $1,000 (or more - hey, I won't turn it down). What matters is raising as much as we can to help us continue to do what we do in the communities we serve.

You can send your check directly to me at home:

2525 28th street, Apt. #1
Santa Monica, CA 90405

But please MAKE YOUR CHECK OUT TO READING TO KIDS, not to me. For more information on Reading to Kids and what we do, visit our web site at www.readingtokids.org. Or you can shoot me any questions you might have,

Once again, and as always, THANK YOU for your time and support. Some of you have given each and every time I have asked, and believe me it is appreciated, and you hold a special place in my prayers. Thank you thank you thank you.

Regards,

Matthew
matthewadamjones@msn.com

MISSING

2007-09-21T11:37:00.001-05:00

BACKSTORY: Nailah (Nigh-eel-luh) Oliani (Oh-lee-ahni) Franklin, 28, has been missing from her University Village (near south side of Chicago) condo and from her job as a pharmaceutical sales representative for Eli Lilly since Tuesday evening, Sept. 18, 2007. She has not been heard from since Tuesday afternoon/evening, missed an important "ride-around" meeting with her sales manager on Wednesday, and has not responded to numerous attempts to contact her via phone, email, text message and visits to her condo. Her company car, a BLACK 2005 Chevy Impala is missing, as are her personal and work laptop computers.

Nailah is a graduate of 1997 Homewood-Flossmoor High School and a 2001 graduate of the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign. She is a successful professional, home owner, doting aunt, loving daughter, sister, cousin, niece and friend and would NOT just up and disappear on her own, or go without contacting anyone for days.

NAILAH O. FRANKLIN

DOB: 04.12.79
HEIGHT: 5’2
WEIGHT: 110-115 POUNDS
EYE/HAIR COLOR: DARK BROWN
COMPLEXION: MEDIUM BROWN
BUILD: PETITE
CAR: 2005 BLACK CHEVY IMPALA IL PLATE #1957855
MISSING FROM CHICAGO, IL: 09.18.07
TIPS? INFO? PLEASE CALL CHICAGO POLICE: 312.746.9259

Be Careful

2007-09-21T11:27:00.000-05:00

There is a new virus circulating. It is called "WORK." If you receive WORK from your colleagues, your boss, or from anyone else, do not touch it under any circumstances. This virus wipes out your private life completely. If you should happen to come in contact with this virus, take two friends and go straight to the nearest bar. Order drinks immediately and after three rounds, you will find that WORK has been completely deleted from your brain. If you don't drink, check out the Dairy Queen Hot Fudge Brownie Supreme! Chocolate is a good substitute! Forward this virus warning immediately to at least five friends. Should you realize you do not have five friends, this means you are already infected by this virus and WORK already controls your life. If this is the case, go to the nearest bar and stay until you make at least five friends. I think I have five friends, but I am not entirely positive, so I'm headed for the bar anyway...it never hurts to be safe!

Three Things

2007-09-19T12:39:00.001-05:00

Three things in life that, once gone, never come back -

Time
Words
Opportunity

Three things in life that can destroy a person -

Anger
Pride
Unforgiveness

Three things in life that you should never lose -

Hope
Peace
Honesty

Three things in life that are most valuable -

Love
Family &Friends
Kindness

Three things in life that are never certain -

Fortune
Success
Dreams

Three things that make a person -

Commitment
Sincerity
Hard work

Three things that are truly constant -
Father - Son - Holy Spirit

I ask the Lord to bless you, as I pray for you today; to guide you and protect you, as you go along your way. God's love is always with you, God's promises are true. And when you give God all your cares, you know God will see you through.

When you get gasoline.........Save some money!

2007-09-19T11:35:00.000-05:00

I received this email for a friend awhile ago and just got around to reading it. Talk about some great tips. I'll be using several. Anything to save money on gas!

---

We've been in petroleum pipeline business for about 31 years, currently working for the Kinder-Morgan Pipeline here in San Jose, CA. We deliver about 4 million gallons in a 24- hour period from the pipeline; one day it is diesel, the next day it's jet fuel and gasoline. We have 34 storage tanks here with a capacity of 16,800,000 gallons.

Here are some tricks to help you get your money's worth:

Fill up your car/truck in the morning when the temperature is still cool. Remember that all service stations have their storage tanks buried below ground. The colder the ground the denser the gasoline. When it gets warmer gasoline expands, so if you're filling up in the afternoon or evening, what should be a gallon is not exactly a gallon. In the petroleum business, the specific gravity and temperature of the fuel (gasoline, jet fuel, diesel, ethanol and other petroleum products) are significant. Every truckload that we load is temperature- compensated so that the indicated gallonage is actually the amount pumped. A one-degree rise in temperature is a big deal for businesses, but service stations don't have temperature compensation at their pumps. (ed.: Which means "too bad for us"........)
If a tanker truck is filling the station's tank at the time you want to buy gas, DO NOT fill up. Most likely, dirt and sludge are being stirred up when gas is being delivered and you might be transferring that dirt from the bottom of their tank into your car's tank.
Fill up when your gas tank is half-full because the more gas you have in your tank, the less air there is and gasoline evaporates rapidly, especially when it's warm. Gasoline storage tanks have an internal floating "roof" membrane to act as a barrier between the gas and the atmosphere, thereby minimizing evaporation. (ed.: Another reason not to wait until you are empty is that you are gradually burning out the fuel sender unit in your gas tank. The fuel pump/sender unit is all one part on most cars now ........replacement is roughly $600)
If you look at the gas trigger (at the pump) you'll see that it has three delivery settings: slow, medium, and high. When you're filling up DO NOT squeeze the trigger of the nozzle to the high setting. You should be pumping at the slow setting, thereby minimizing vapors created while you are pumping. Hoses at the pump are corrugated; the corrugations act as a return path for vapor recovery from gas that already has been metered. If you are pumping at the high setting, the agitated gasoline contains more vapor, which is being sucked back into the underground tank...............so you're getting less gas for your money.

FREE THE JENA 6 ...ENOUGH IS ENOUGH... FREE THE JENA SIX

2007-09-18T13:10:00.000-05:00

Source: http://www.michaelbaisden.com

On September 20, 2007 more than 1 million people will wear BLACK as we unite in one voice with one message to declare that UN-EQUAL JUSTICE is just not acceptable. The world will be watching when not just African Americans but people of all races take a stand for something that we all believe in. Mychal Bell and the Jena Six should be free. If you have not heard about their case and why these average teenagers, good students, great athletes and are now fighting for their lives (one student Mychal Bell has been in jail since Dec. 2006) please CLICK HERE NOW to view this video for the shock of your life and on any of the links below for more information. This is clearly a case of racism, but Michael Baisden reminds us the protest in Jena, LA, the US and around the world is not an attack on white people but against a system that has failed us all. It is not about black and white but about what is wrong and what is right!

Enough is Enough...Un-Equal Justice is just not acceptable! ..Wear Black on September 20th to show your support!

RALLY & MARCH FOR PEACE AND JUSTICE

DATE: SEPTEMBER 20, 2007
LOCATION: JENA, LA
WHAT TO WEAR: BLACK
SCHEDULE:*
--- 7:00am Protesters assemble at Ward 10 Recreation Park
--- 7:30am March to the steps of the LaSalle Parish Courthouse
--- 8:00am Prayers / Speakers front of the Courthouse
--- 9:00am Sentencing for Mychal Bell
--- 11:00am March to Park / Rally in Support of Mychal Bell & the Jena 6
--- 2:00pm Adjournment
--- 4:00pm Town Hall Meeting on "Quality Education without Fear or Intimidation" C-Span
* Schedule is tentative and subject to change based on sentencing time

FOR MORE INFORMATION CLICK ON ANY LINK BELOW:

- Latest Updates
- About The Jena Six
- More Facts on The Jena Six Case
- Bus Information
- Hotels in the Area
- Daily updates LIVE on The Michael Baisden Show
- Sign the Petition [to Justice Department]
- Sign the Petition [Louisiana Governor]
- Video Clips
- Latest News Stories
- Timeline / Slideshow / More Photo's
- Organizations
- Press
- Make a Donation
- Democracy Now
- Contact Your Congressman
- Local Marches around the US and The World
- Discussion Forum
- Send Mychal Bell a letter of encouragement
- Register to Vote

HERE’S HOW YOU CAN PROTEST FROM ANYWHERE:

1 Wear BLACK on September 20th to protest Un-Equal Justice wherever you are
2 Register to Vote to make your voice heard beyond today
3 Sign the Petitions above
4 Email government officials
5 Call government officials
6 Tell your friends and co-workers to do the same

Week 240

2007-09-10T10:50:00.000-05:00

Dork :: Pocket Protector

Refurbished :: New but Not New

Basket :: Case

Mousse :: Chocolate

Studio :: 57

8 ball :: Get Behind It

Masking tape :: Mouth

Love :: What's It Got to Do With It?

Wilder :: Van

Lindsey :: Poor, poor girl

Wet Pants

2007-09-04T16:43:00.000-05:00

Come with me to a third grade classroom..... There is a nine-year-old kid sitting at his desk and all of a sudden, there is a puddle between his feet and the front of his pants are wet. He thinks his heart is going to stop because he cannot possibly imagine how this has happened. It's never happened before, and he knows that when the boys find out he will never hear the end of it. When the girls find out, they'll never
speak to him again as long as he lives.

The boy believes his heart is going to stop; he puts his head down and prays this prayer, 'Dear God, this is an emergency! I need help now! Five minutes from now I'm dead meat.'

He looks up from his prayer and here comes the teacher with a look in her eyes that says he has been discovered.As the teacher is walking toward him, a classmate named Susie is carrying a goldfish bowl that is filled with water. Susie trips in front of the teacher and inexplicably dumps the bowl of water in the boy's lap.The boy pretends to be angry, but all the while is saying to himself, 'Thank you, Lord! Thank you, Lord!'

Now all of a sudden, instead of being the object of ridicule, the boy is the object of sympathy. The teacher rushes him downstairs and gives him gym shorts to put on while his pants dry out. All the other children are on their hands and knees cleaning up around his desk. The sympathy is wonderful. But as life would have it, the ridicule that should have been his has been transferred to someone else - Susie. She tries to help, but they tell her to get out. You've done enough, you klutz!'

Finally, at the end of the day, as they are waiting for the bus, the boy walks over to Susie and whispers, 'You did that on purpose, didn't you?' Susie whispers back, 'I wet my pants once too.'

May God help us see the opportunities that are always around us to do good..

Remember.....Just going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in your garage makes you a car.

Each and everyone one of us is going through tough times right now, but God is getting ready to bless you in a way that only He can. Keep the faith.

This prayer is powerful, and prayer is one of the best gifts we receive. There is no cost but a lot of rewards. Let's continue to pray for one another.

The Prayer:

Father, I ask You to bless my friends, relatives and those that I care deeply for, who are reading this right now. Show them a new revelation of Your love and power. Holy Spirit, I ask You to minister to their spirit at this very moment. Where there is pain, give them Your peace and mercy. Where there is self-doubt, release a renewed confidence through Your grace. Where there is need, I ask you to fulfill their needs. Bless their homes, families, finances, their goings and their comings. Amen.

6 out of 10

2007-09-04T15:41:00.000-05:00

By looking at a picture of a person, you have to decide if he is a computer geek or a serial killer. Go with your gut feeling and click on your choice.

There are 10 photos. Your score will be given at the end.

Click here to begin your analysis.

As Seen on K's

2007-09-03T20:56:00.000-05:00

You Belong in London

A little old fashioned, and a little modern.
A little traditional, and a little bit punk rock.
A unique soul like you needs a city that offers everything.
No wonder you and London will get along so well.

What City Do You Belong In?

Liar, Liar Pants on Fire

2007-08-30T10:14:00.000-05:00

It would appear I am raising a liar. I don't know how this turn of events came to be, but I can let you know that it is going to end badly for the liar. Let's provide a little history.

Near the end of last year's school year, Munchkin decided that to keep out of trouble at school for not completing her homework she would lie on me. Big mistake! I went straight to the source (her teacher) for an explanation and found out the truth. I'm not sure why Munchkin thought this would be a good idea. Maybe she thought I wouldn't contact her teacher. Considering the fact that I talked to her teacher fairly regularly she didn't think that through completely. Once I found out what happened, she got the wuppin' of her life AND I grounded her. After that incident she said she didn't really understand what it meant to lie but now she did. Great! Wonderful! Awesome! Lesson learned, right? Not so much.

Yesterday was the first day of school. Munchkin has asthma so she is supposed to carry her inhaler with her at all times. I asked her if she had it in her backpack and she said she did. When we got home, her breathing was labored. I asked her if she used her inhaler and she said yes. I used it at school. Now this is suspicious because they aren't allowed to use medicine at school and I said so. She said she used it when she was headed out of the building once class was dismissed. Oh, OK! Then I asked her where her inhaler was. On my bedside table was the reply. Oh, OK! This morning we switched bags. Therefore, I told Munchkin to go get her inhaler and put it in her bag. Well she goes upstairs to get it and puts it in her bag. I told her to let me see it. She likes - no, no it's in there. I look in the bag and lo and behold no inhaler. Well now! Her story quickly changed to "OK. I don't have it. I don't know where it is."

Funny how a lie unravels that way. Essentially I got to the point that she lied about everything involving the inhaler from yesterday to today. Yes was the reply. OK. I knew that I put her inhaler in her overnight bag when she stayed at my parents house this week. I went upstairs and that's where the inhaler still was - in.the.bag. I came downstairs with the inhaler and the belt. Yeah the belt because now it's time for a refresher course in lying. I proceeded to light a fire. Her legs were the twigs and my belt was the match.

Do you know that after all of that Squirm has the nerve to try to add his two cents about spanking his sister? I asked him if he wanted some. Nooooo....uh huh....

So what is the resolution? Munchkin is grounded - again! She gets to come home, clean up, shower (cause she stinks, remember?), and spend quality time in her room alone. Oh and now her parents don't trust her. We officially live in the "show me" state. What does this mean? Every time she says that she has done something, she has to show me. I finished my homework - show me. I cleaned my room - show me. I brushed my teeth - show me. I wiped my ass - show me.

First puberty and now lying. As if life could get anymore interesting.

It's Official

2007-08-29T17:54:00.001-05:00

I have a 3rd-grader. Munchkin's first day of 3rd grade was today. She was so excited. I don't remember being this excited about school. She is one of those rare birds who actually likes school and can't wait for it to begin. Her teacher seems no-nonsense so that is a relief. 3rd grade is a stepping it up to the next level. Time to start writing in cursive, doing multiplication and long division and prepping for *gasp* middle school.

On another note, MD had a rude awakening. Munchkin has a crush on a boy from her 2nd grade class. Lo and behold that same boy is in her 3rd grade class. When she saw him she hid behind me and said his name. MD turned around to see what the commotion was. He realized immediately that his little girl liked a boy. By the look on his face you would have thought someone kicked him in the balls. His only comment at that time was "Oh no!" We'll be alright - well at least I will. Let's see what tomorrow brings!

Christians by Maya Angelou

2007-08-28T16:08:00.000-05:00

I really like this poem. Enjoy!
---
When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not shouting "I'm clean livin."
I'm whispering "I was lost,"
Now I'm found and forgiven.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble
and need CHRIST to be my guide.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak
and need HIS strength to carry on.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed
and need God to clean my mess.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible
but, God believes I am worth it.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I still feel the sting of pain,
I have my share of heartaches
So I call upon His name.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not holier than thou,
I'm just a simple sinner
who received God's good grace, somehow.

~Maya Angelou~

Week 238

2007-08-27T17:43:00.001-05:00

Uneven :: Pavement

Wonder :: Stevie

Spider :: Plant

Emma :: Smemma

Swing :: Dance

Orbit :: Eye

Flirt :: Booty, Booty, Booty

Donation :: Money

Veil :: Bridal

Atmosphere :: Pressure

Like Sands Through the Hourglass...

2007-08-27T17:27:00.000-05:00

These are the days of our lives. Or better yet, we can count our days by the growth of our children. However you want to put it, we have come to a major milestone. Munchkin needs deodorant. I know some of you are thinking - isn't she only 3 years old? What could she possible need deodorant for? Hold onto your hats people. Munchkin will be 9 in November. Yes I said it out loud - 9 YEARS OLD! She has been hoping for months now to need deodorant. Well I don't think she realizes what comes with deodorant. In my book she has officially started "the change." Dundunduuuuunnnnn!

For those of you that don't know my family - which is a majority - we call anything hormone-related in a woman's life "the change". Munchkin is officially in puberty. I know this because she STINKS! Not little kid funk. I'm talking about sweating all night at the club funk.

This equates to her first change of life. How many changes will she go through remains to be seen. She has to survive this one. I think I am ready for the mood swings, pouty faces, training bras, boyfriends, slamming doors and punishment. MD is not. I don't even think he realizes that his is raising young women. They are just his babies. Life is about to get interesting.

A Little Perspective

2007-08-23T20:37:00.000-05:00

I haven't been following the story of Elvira Arellano. The issue of immigration is such a hot one but it seems that no progress is being made. I was curious how she came to authorities' attention in the first place. This story provides some background. I thought identity theft was a federal crime. Did I miss something?

Madness

2007-08-21T14:43:00.000-05:00

I know I haven't posted in a while. Quite frankly, blogging seemed to happen for the handful of readers I had then for myself. Then I ran across this:

This is complete and utter madness. A complete PSA gone wrong but I can't stop myself from watching again and again and again. All I can say is READ A BOOK!!!

Happy Birthday

2005-06-03T13:55:00.000-05:00

It's Carlos's birthday today. Go wish him a happy one.

Sisters

2005-06-02T11:24:00.000-05:00

I got this email from a friend. I'm posting it here because it's true. I hope you enjoy.
-------
A young wife sat on a sofa on a hot humid day, drinking iced tea and visiting with her Mother.

As they talked about life, about marriage, about the responsibilities of life and the obligations of adulthood, the mother clinked the ice cubes in her glass thoughtfully and turned a clear, sober glance upon her daughter.

"Don't forget your Sisters," she advised, swirling the tea leaves to the bottom of her glass." They'll be more important as you get older. No matter how much you love your husband, no matter how much you love the children you may have, you are still going to need Sisters. Remember to go places with them now and then; do things with them. And remember that "Sisters" also means your girlfriends, your daughters, and other women relatives too. You'll need other women. Women always do."

"What a funny piece of advice!" the young woman thought. 'Haven't I just gotten married? Haven't I just joined the couple-world? I'm now a married woman, for goodness sake! A grownup. Surely my husband and the family we may start will be all I need to make my life worthwhile! But she listened to her Mother.

She kept contact with her Sisters and made more women friends each year.

As the years tumbled by, one after another, she gradually came to understand that her Mom really knew what she was talking about.

As time and nature work their changes and their mysteries upon a woman, Sisters are the mainstays of her life. After almost 50 years of living in this world, here is what I've learned:
Times passes.
Life happens.
Distance separates.
Children grow up.
Love waxes and wanes.
Hearts break.
Careers end.
Jobs come and go.
Parents die.
Colleagues forget favors.
Men don't call when they say they will.

BUT Sisters are there, no matter how much time and how many miles are between you. A Sister is never farther away than needing her can reach.

When you have to walk that lonesome valley, and you have to walk it for yourself, your Sisters will be on the valley's rim, cheering you on, praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the valley's end. Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk beside you. Or come in and carry you out.

My mother, sister, sister-in-laws, aunts, and "girlfriends", bless my life! The world wouldn't be the same without them, and neither would I.

When we began this adventure called womanhood, we had no idea of the incredible joys or sorrows that lay ahead. Nor did we know how much we would need each other. Every day, we need each other still.

Summer Shoe Pledge

2005-05-31T15:45:00.000-05:00

It's that time of year - summertime. When women are exposing their toes to the world, whether they should be doing it or not. Please read this public service announcement before you do so.

Please raise your big toes and repeat after me:

As a member of the Cute Girl Sisterhood, I pledge to follow the rules when I wear sandals and other open-toe shoes.

I promise to always wear sandals that fit. My toes will not hang over and touch the ground, nor will my heels spill over the backs. And the sides and tops of my feet will not pudge out between the straps.

I will go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and chip-free. I will not cheat and just touch up my big toe.

I will sand down any mounds of skin before they turn hard and yellow. I will shave the hairs off my big toe.

I won't wear pantyhose even if my misinformed girlfriend, coworker, mother, sister tells me the toe seam really will stay under my toes if I tuck it there.

If a strap breaks, I won't duct-tape, pin, glue or tuck it back into place hoping it will stay put. I will get my shoe fixed or toss it.

I will not live in corn denial, rather I will lean on my good friend Dr. Scholl's if my feet need him.

I will resist the urge to buy jelly shoes at Payless for the low, low price of $4.99 even if my feet are small enough to fit into the kids' sizes. This is out of concern for my safety, and the safety of others. No one can walk properly when standing in a pool of sweat and I would hate to take someone down with me as I fall and break my ankle.

I will take my toe ring off toward the end of the day if my toes swell and begin to look like Vienna sausages.

If I have been privy to the magic that is Foot Soap, I will share that knowledge and experience with the non-initiated.

I will be brutally honest with my girlfriend/sister/coworker when she asks me if her feet are too ugly to wear sandals. Someone has to tell her that her toes are as long as my fingers and no sandal makes creepy feet look good.

This is my summer shoe pledge to you.

Week 121

2005-05-31T11:28:00.000-05:00

Unconscious Mutterings

Crowd:: Pleaser
Hamburger:: Helper
Choker:: Necklace
Lights:: Camera, Action
Tinsel:: Town
Testament:: Books of the bible
Best part of the day:: Waking up
Election:: Rigged
Clarinet:: Woodwind
Dead Sea:: Scrolls

Happy Birthday to Me

2005-05-16T16:51:00.000-05:00

Today marks an auspicious occasion...my birthday. I officially enter the 30s around 8:00 pm today and will be 31. I guess I could be sad about being 31 except for a few things...

I don't look 31
MD is 5 years older than me so I will always have someone to be younger than
Brothaman is 4 years younger than me but I look younger than him
The women in my family age gracefully

I'm blessed to have made it this far. I hope to make it another 31 years and more. Happy Birthday to meeeeeee!!!

Why Parents Go Gray

2005-05-12T09:51:00.000-05:00

The boss of a big company who needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers, dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper,

"Hello."

"Is your daddy home?" he asked.

"Yes," whispered the small voice

"May I talk with him?"

The child whispered, "No."

Surprised, and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your mommy there?"

"Yes."

"May I talk with her?"

Again the small voice whispered, "No."

Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, "Is anybody else there?"

"Yes, " whispered the child, "a policeman."

Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked,

"May I speak with the policeman?"

"No he's busy" whispered the child.

"Busy doing what?"

"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman", came the whispered answer.

Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the earpiece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise?"

"A hello-copper" answered the whispering voice.

"What is going on there?" asked the boss, now alarmed.

In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper."

Alarmed, concerned and even more then a little frustrated the boss asked, "What are they searching for?"

Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle:

"ME"

Week 118

2005-05-09T10:17:00.000-05:00

Here you go with Unconscious Mutterings

Android:: R2D2
Revenge:: Best Served Cold
Knight:: of the Round Table
Stranded:: Lost
Weakness:: Cheesecake
Greed:: Deadly Sin
Walter:: Kronkite
Dense:: Hard-Headed
Sheep:: God's Own
Propane:: Grilling

8 weeks and counting

2005-05-05T11:30:00.000-05:00

It’s officially eight weeks since I had Squirt. Being the mother of 3 has its challenges but so far so good. So far so good…who am I kidding? As you can tell by my unkymood, I am zombified. Lack of sleep + breastfeeding + 3 kids at home all the time + not eating well = zombified. Despite all that, everyone keeps telling me how good I look. I will say that breastfeeding has helped me shed most of the pregnancy weight. Based on my weigh-in today I am 10 pounds heavier than where I started out. However the dark circles under my eyes must be invisible to everyone else but me. We’ve had a lot going on in the past two months so let’s start at the beginning.

A New House
As of February 23, MD and I own a house. The house we were hoping to get we got and closed on in record time. As of February 26 we had bought our washer and dryer. Consumer Reports came in handy for that. As of February 28 we had moved into said house. Yes, closed on Wednesday and moved on Monday. We used Golan Moving and Storage. I HIGHLY recommend them to anyone moving anytime soon. They were professional and quick and worth the money. So within a week we were living in the suburbs of Chicago.

This particular move is amazing. First of all MD swore he would never live in the suburbs yet when we started looking for a house – seriously looking not just contemplating it – he suggested moving to the suburbs. I wisely kept my mouth shut and asked where. Imagine my surprise when he wanted to move to my hometown. Basically the deciding factor was money goes farther in the suburbs. You get more house out here than in the city. It’s a sad state of affairs but the truth. Considering we needed more space this was very important. We now have a 4BR/2.5BA house with a 2 car garage. It’s not a big house from the outside but it’s laid out well. We have a separate living room and dining room, an eat-in kitchen with wood floors and family room. The yard needs work but that’s because no one took care of it. The yard is definitely something we can tackle together.

We still have boxes to unpack but we make progress everyday. WE HAVE A HOUSE!

A New Baby
We moved into the new house on February 28 and Squirt made his appearance on March 9. As noted he was born at 7:44 pm. We had our regularly scheduled appointment that afternoon and the doctor sent us over to the hospital to be induced. We went home to get my bag. By the time we got back to the hospital around 6 – 6:30 the contractions were coming regularly. I guess Squirt decided he didn’t want to be evicted. This is the 3rd time I had completely natural labor. I feel like superwoman. I breathed through the contractions and when I was at the point where I wanted to ask for drugs I decided to push. I pushed once and he crowned. I pushed again and the head was out. 3rd push and he squirted out – literally. If the doctor hadn’t caught him, he would have fallen on the ground. 3 pushes and no stitches. I was overjoyed. All the nurses were impressed. I was the hero in the maternity ward. We got to go home on Friday – to our new house. I’ll never get tired of saying that.

A New School
Munchkin started kindergarten at her new school and LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVES IT. Every day she comes home and I ask her how school was and she says Great. They have a play at school on Friday and she knew her lines from day 1.

We’ve had a lot of new beginnings in the past few months. Case in point – Munchkin and Squirm just started swim lessons on Tuesday. As if we didn’t have enough to do we have swim lessons, right? MD is loving it. I’m just tired. Pray for us.

Week 114

2005-04-11T11:50:00.000-05:00

It's been a minute since I did Unconscious Mutterings but my brain could use the workout so here we go...

Horrendous:: Terrible
Home video:: Not always America's Funniest
What a girl wants:: Peace and Quiet
Grounded:: Go to your room
Trusting:: Blind
Simplistic:: Easy
Buzz:: Gossip
Balcony:: Romeo oh Romeo
Roar:: Lion's Call
Hooker:: Economy Call Girl

PMS

2005-04-08T18:51:00.000-05:00

The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his own hands!

This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, or significant other!

DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate

DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?
SAFER: Wow, you look good in brown.
SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!
ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate

DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
SAFER: Could we be overreacting?
SAFEST: Here's my paycheck.
ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate

DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate

DANGEROUS: What did you do all day?
SAFER: I hope you didn't over-do it today.
SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe!
ULTRA SAFE: Have some more chocolate.

13 Things PMS Stands For
1. Pass My Shotgun
2. Psychotic Mood Shift
3. Perpetual Munching Spree
4. Puffy Mid-Section
5. People Make me Sick
6. Provide Me with Sweets
7. Pardon My Sobbing
8. Pimples May Surface
9. Pass My Sweatpants
10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men Suck
12. Pack My Stuff

And my favorite one...
13. Potential Murder Suspect

Pass this on to all of your hormonal friends and those who might need a good laugh or men who need a warning!! And remember: Money talks....But Chocolate sings.

"Life may not be the party we hoped for...but while we are here we might as well dance!"

Deep Thought

2005-03-31T11:48:00.000-06:00

Many of us think that happiness is found in our circumstances. Our happiness is not found in circumstances, but in ourselves. it is not something we see, like a rainbow, or feel, like the heat of a fire. happiness is something we are. Soren Kierkegaard writes, "If an Arab in the desert were suddenly to discover a spring in his tent, and so would always be able to have water in abundance, how fortunate he would consider himself; so too, when a man who...is always turned toward the outside, thinking that his happiness lies outside him, finally turns inward and discovers that the source is within him." Look no further, God is the source of our happiness. Our happiness is right where we are.