Thursday, August 30, 2007

Liar, Liar Pants on Fire

It would appear I am raising a liar. I don't know how this turn of events came to be, but I can let you know that it is going to end badly for the liar. Let's provide a little history.

Near the end of last year's school year, Munchkin decided that to keep out of trouble at school for not completing her homework she would lie on me. Big mistake! I went straight to the source (her teacher) for an explanation and found out the truth. I'm not sure why Munchkin thought this would be a good idea. Maybe she thought I wouldn't contact her teacher. Considering the fact that I talked to her teacher fairly regularly she didn't think that through completely. Once I found out what happened, she got the wuppin' of her life AND I grounded her. After that incident she said she didn't really understand what it meant to lie but now she did. Great! Wonderful! Awesome! Lesson learned, right? Not so much.

Yesterday was the first day of school. Munchkin has asthma so she is supposed to carry her inhaler with her at all times. I asked her if she had it in her backpack and she said she did. When we got home, her breathing was labored. I asked her if she used her inhaler and she said yes. I used it at school. Now this is suspicious because they aren't allowed to use medicine at school and I said so. She said she used it when she was headed out of the building once class was dismissed. Oh, OK! Then I asked her where her inhaler was. On my bedside table was the reply. Oh, OK! This morning we switched bags. Therefore, I told Munchkin to go get her inhaler and put it in her bag. Well she goes upstairs to get it and puts it in her bag. I told her to let me see it. She likes - no, no it's in there. I look in the bag and lo and behold no inhaler. Well now! Her story quickly changed to "OK. I don't have it. I don't know where it is."

Funny how a lie unravels that way. Essentially I got to the point that she lied about everything involving the inhaler from yesterday to today. Yes was the reply. OK. I knew that I put her inhaler in her overnight bag when she stayed at my parents house this week. I went upstairs and that's where the inhaler still was - in.the.bag. I came downstairs with the inhaler and the belt. Yeah the belt because now it's time for a refresher course in lying. I proceeded to light a fire. Her legs were the twigs and my belt was the match.

Do you know that after all of that Squirm has the nerve to try to add his two cents about spanking his sister? I asked him if he wanted some. Nooooo....uh huh....

So what is the resolution? Munchkin is grounded - again! She gets to come home, clean up, shower (cause she stinks, remember?), and spend quality time in her room alone. Oh and now her parents don't trust her. We officially live in the "show me" state. What does this mean? Every time she says that she has done something, she has to show me. I finished my homework - show me. I cleaned my room - show me. I brushed my teeth - show me. I wiped my ass - show me.

First puberty and now lying. As if life could get anymore interesting.

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

It's Official

I have a 3rd-grader. Munchkin's first day of 3rd grade was today. She was so excited. I don't remember being this excited about school. She is one of those rare birds who actually likes school and can't wait for it to begin. Her teacher seems no-nonsense so that is a relief. 3rd grade is a stepping it up to the next level. Time to start writing in cursive, doing multiplication and long division and prepping for *gasp* middle school.

On another note, MD had a rude awakening. Munchkin has a crush on a boy from her 2nd grade class. Lo and behold that same boy is in her 3rd grade class. When she saw him she hid behind me and said his name. MD turned around to see what the commotion was. He realized immediately that his little girl liked a boy. By the look on his face you would have thought someone kicked him in the balls. His only comment at that time was "Oh no!" We'll be alright - well at least I will. Let's see what tomorrow brings!

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Christians by Maya Angelou

I really like this poem. Enjoy!
When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not shouting "I'm clean livin."
I'm whispering "I was lost,"
Now I'm found and forgiven.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble
and need CHRIST to be my guide.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak
and need HIS strength to carry on.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed
and need God to clean my mess.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible
but, God believes I am worth it.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I still feel the sting of pain,
I have my share of heartaches
So I call upon His name.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not holier than thou,
I'm just a simple sinner
who received God's good grace, somehow.

~Maya Angelou~

Monday, August 27, 2007

Week 238

  1. Uneven :: Pavement

  2. Wonder :: Stevie

  3. Spider :: Plant

  4. Emma :: Smemma

  5. Swing :: Dance

  6. Orbit :: Eye

  7. Flirt :: Booty, Booty, Booty

  8. Donation :: Money

  9. Veil :: Bridal

  10. Atmosphere :: Pressure

Like Sands Through the Hourglass...

These are the days of our lives. Or better yet, we can count our days by the growth of our children. However you want to put it, we have come to a major milestone. Munchkin needs deodorant. I know some of you are thinking - isn't she only 3 years old? What could she possible need deodorant for? Hold onto your hats people. Munchkin will be 9 in November. Yes I said it out loud - 9 YEARS OLD! She has been hoping for months now to need deodorant. Well I don't think she realizes what comes with deodorant. In my book she has officially started "the change." Dundunduuuuunnnnn!

For those of you that don't know my family - which is a majority - we call anything hormone-related in a woman's life "the change". Munchkin is officially in puberty. I know this because she STINKS! Not little kid funk. I'm talking about sweating all night at the club funk.

This equates to her first change of life. How many changes will she go through remains to be seen. She has to survive this one. I think I am ready for the mood swings, pouty faces, training bras, boyfriends, slamming doors and punishment. MD is not. I don't even think he realizes that his is raising young women. They are just his babies. Life is about to get interesting.

Thursday, August 23, 2007

A Little Perspective

I haven't been following the story of Elvira Arellano. The issue of immigration is such a hot one but it seems that no progress is being made. I was curious how she came to authorities' attention in the first place. This story provides some background. I thought identity theft was a federal crime. Did I miss something?

Tuesday, August 21, 2007


I know I haven't posted in a while. Quite frankly, blogging seemed to happen for the handful of readers I had then for myself. Then I ran across this:

This is complete and utter madness. A complete PSA gone wrong but I can't stop myself from watching again and again and again. All I can say is READ A BOOK!!!