Thursday, August 30, 2007

Liar, Liar Pants on Fire

It would appear I am raising a liar. I don't know how this turn of events came to be, but I can let you know that it is going to end badly for the liar. Let's provide a little history.

Near the end of last year's school year, Munchkin decided that to keep out of trouble at school for not completing her homework she would lie on me. Big mistake! I went straight to the source (her teacher) for an explanation and found out the truth. I'm not sure why Munchkin thought this would be a good idea. Maybe she thought I wouldn't contact her teacher. Considering the fact that I talked to her teacher fairly regularly she didn't think that through completely. Once I found out what happened, she got the wuppin' of her life AND I grounded her. After that incident she said she didn't really understand what it meant to lie but now she did. Great! Wonderful! Awesome! Lesson learned, right? Not so much.

Yesterday was the first day of school. Munchkin has asthma so she is supposed to carry her inhaler with her at all times. I asked her if she had it in her backpack and she said she did. When we got home, her breathing was labored. I asked her if she used her inhaler and she said yes. I used it at school. Now this is suspicious because they aren't allowed to use medicine at school and I said so. She said she used it when she was headed out of the building once class was dismissed. Oh, OK! Then I asked her where her inhaler was. On my bedside table was the reply. Oh, OK! This morning we switched bags. Therefore, I told Munchkin to go get her inhaler and put it in her bag. Well she goes upstairs to get it and puts it in her bag. I told her to let me see it. She likes - no, no it's in there. I look in the bag and lo and behold no inhaler. Well now! Her story quickly changed to "OK. I don't have it. I don't know where it is."

Funny how a lie unravels that way. Essentially I got to the point that she lied about everything involving the inhaler from yesterday to today. Yes was the reply. OK. I knew that I put her inhaler in her overnight bag when she stayed at my parents house this week. I went upstairs and that's where the inhaler still was - in.the.bag. I came downstairs with the inhaler and the belt. Yeah the belt because now it's time for a refresher course in lying. I proceeded to light a fire. Her legs were the twigs and my belt was the match.

Do you know that after all of that Squirm has the nerve to try to add his two cents about spanking his sister? I asked him if he wanted some. Nooooo....uh huh....

So what is the resolution? Munchkin is grounded - again! She gets to come home, clean up, shower (cause she stinks, remember?), and spend quality time in her room alone. Oh and now her parents don't trust her. We officially live in the "show me" state. What does this mean? Every time she says that she has done something, she has to show me. I finished my homework - show me. I cleaned my room - show me. I brushed my teeth - show me. I wiped my ass - show me.

First puberty and now lying. As if life could get anymore interesting.

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